The fabulous @EuphemiseThis is back! And she almost needs no introduction, because she’s written so much hot and brilliant stuff here before – velvet fetishes, getting spanked by a couple, her first threesome… she’s packed a hell of a lot of fun into an incredibly sexy life so far. Today she’s here to talk about her changing relationship to her body as she gets older, challenging some of the bullshit about what ‘should’ be, and sharing a bit of the joy of fucking in her forties.
Fucking in my forties
Time flies when you’re having fun and, somehow, I’ve now spent over 46 years on this Earth. For a long while I didn’t look my age and I always wondered if the passage of time would start to show on my face all at once; if I’d suddenly stop getting those gasps of surprise when I revealed that I was born in the 1970s. Well, I think we’re there now, me and my middle-aged-lady-face and soft squishy belly. I’m finally having to come to terms with ageing – which is far less about wrinkles and grey hairs than I was led to believe – and am having to learn to cope with the fact that I’m no longer the 25-year-old that my brain sometimes thinks I am.
However, coping with ageing as a woman is even harder than it might seem because of the gremlins that constantly work away inside my mind. Little brain weasels that have been fed with a lifetime of patriarchal beauty standards and that poke me whenever I catch sight of myself how I really look. When I glance at photographs and reflections where I’m not posed in a way that hides what society tells me are flaws, they’ll pop up to remind me that my size and my age are not desirable.
After all, fuckable older women are the tall slender ones, right? You’ll never get called a MILF if you have short legs, a belly and chubby cheeks. If your body is more Mrs Claus than Mrs Robinson. If you don’t have the money and time or, to be perfectly honest, the inclination to hire a personal trainer and get a full body wax all the fucking time. Older women are not celebrated for their wisdom and confidence, or their extensive knowledge and experience of sex, just their ability to ‘look good for their age.’ So, that’s why I sometimes look in the mirror and think ‘who’d want to fuck this?’
But when I’m not looking, when I’m feeling… that’s when the good stuff happens. When I’m oh so horny and have a quick yet satisfying wank; relishing the sensations that radiate from my clit, the feeling of wetness under my fingertips, and the way my soft, full breasts rise and fall when my breathing quickens. When I’m letting my mind go into overdrive while sexting with a horny friend [side note: are they actually fuckbuddies if it’s all online? – fuck yes – GOTN] I’m not worrying about how I look, just enjoying how those words and voice notes are turning us both on and how the fiery throb in my cunt is slowly taking over my body to the point where I wonder if I can cum from this alone.
Occasionally, the gremlins still get me though. When I share nudes, I sometimes wonder if the image is “too real” to be appealing, or if the opposite is true and I’m choosing so many flattering poses that there’s no way I’d be able to match up in real life. But whenever I have physically fucked someone new in recent years, my body has been welcomed with open arms, kind words and appreciative noises. I have been desired as much as I desire them; each person, all at least a decade younger than me, has seen my body as a delightful erotic playground and has not seemed to notice any of the parts of it I’d worried might be off putting.
So when will I learn? When will I finally be able to ignore the brain weasels and actually give the zero fucks I long for? I really do think that blissful headspace is coming soon and, in the meantime, I shall push myself to explore the erotic and to enjoy my body for the marvel it is. I have nearly three decades of experience in fucking people of all genders, and even more years experience of fucking myself, yet I’m still finding new things to enjoy. Hopefully I can keep sharing this journey with others, and enjoy the feeling of their fingers sinking into my softness as we kiss… and as we fuck.
6 Comments
Oh, this is wonderful!
Great essay. I wish woman could spend 5 minutes inside the mind of a man and see that yes we are certainly visually attracted to feminine beauty the same as woman who seem to fawn over the likes or the George Clooney’s of the world or Brad Pitts. But that attraction aside, for me and I’m sure many, many men a woman’s attitude, feelings about herself and willingness to indulge in the same things we enjoy is far more exciting than the abstract notion of the “perfect” woman. My favorite photo’s to peruse of the opposite sex are not the posed models but the real woman who take delight in sharing or being shown off in various online forums and locations. The more comfortable you are with who you are the more “attractive” you are to others.
And if someone is less than satisfied with your appearance as a “real woman” then move on (rapidly) to others who appreciate what your bringing to the table. Good luck with the brain weasels. Happy to help!
Love, love, love this. 💕💕💕
Thanks that is a great article. We are active in the swinging world and it is surprising how many people are discovering themselves in their 40s and 50s or even 60s and having the best sex of their lives. Perhaps kids growing up or having more money or just realising that life is short and being able to explore.
I was in my early 50s before I conquered those brain weasels, now almost 60 and having fantastic sex with lovely people. There’s the occasional zombie weasel, but I stomp ’em. Ha!
Reading these comments it seems like I have decades of fun ahead of me!