This job isn’t all wanking and audio porn – sometimes it involves a lot of boring admin. But one of the nice things about it is that even on the dullest of days, when I’m buried in spreadsheets and invoices, I can receive two incredible messages barely an hour apart from men telling me how fun it is to watch their jizz bounce on the vibrating pad of a sex toy. One was via DM from the lovely CJBrook_, who (correctly) surmised I might be interested in ‘what effect the inside vibrating pad has on a load of spunk’, and the other came in this glorious review. If you’re curious about dick vibrations, and specifically the unique, thrumming intensity of the Hot Octopuss Pulse Solo Essential (keyword for Google – did you spot it?), then I hope you enjoy this delightfully fun account of my anonymous guest blogger’s first ever Pulse wank.

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A man I loved betrayed a woman I loved a long long time ago. I am still not over it, and I don’t think I ever will be. I was quite young, but it’s still raw, this feeling, still present. The anger sits just beneath the surface of who I am, stored within me like carbon crushed to coal over centuries, just waiting for a spark that will set it all on fire. Recently, a different guy betrayed another woman I love, and I felt it all again. Exactly the same: that rush of hatred. Anger. The desire to tear down walls and scream. It’s absolutely none of my business, but that doesn’t mean it doesn’t hurt.

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Listen before I even begin to introduce you to this week’s guest blogger – rmp792 – you absolutely need to know that not only has he guest blogged for me before (about how he fell in love with /r/GoneWildAudio), but he has also written, produced and starred in a ten-voice erotic audio steampunk drama. Yes, I KNOW. Your own CV will never seem as impressive again. While you obviously need to go bookmark that to check it out (Erotic! Steampunk! Drama! I listened to it this morning and it was a delightfully fun way to start the day), first why not relax and enjoy this gorgeous guest post all about the art of begging, and how to weave consent into scenes in which you – or someone you fancy – wants to beg for it…

Rmp792 has kindly recorded this begging story, and post, as audio porn – click ‘listen now’ above or scroll down for text. 

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Lockdown fucking sucks for so many people, and I recognise my own luck in being able to weather the pandemic trapped in a house with someone I love, despite their occasional adventures in finding new ways to drive me up the wall. But how do you deal with non-monogamy and Coronavirus? Lockdown living that actively pushes you into monogamy? Today’s guest blogger is Molly Quell, and she’s here to tell you about her experience as a non-monogamous person during Coronavirus.

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How much do you care about porn video quality? Would you veto a video because it doesn’t have enough pixels? Would you skip over a cam stream because the sound was too fuzzy or avoid audio porn if the mic didn’t have a pop guard? My boyfriend gives a massive shit about the quality of particular videos which is not, in itself, a problem… until we watch porn together.

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