Sometimes when we’re feeling horny, my partner and I will live out fantasies by telling each other stories. Pretending we’re in a group of people, and describing who’s doing what to who, and how hard each of us is coming. I’ve wanted to write a post about these couple fantasies for a while, because it’s a tip I recommend to others quite a lot – if they want to consider threesomes or group sex, for instance, but they’re nervous about putting it into practice. It’s a fun, hot way to explore these fantasies in a safe environment, and this week’s guest blogger – Neo – has beaten me to the punch, with a superb, almost real-time description of what happened when he and his wife engaged in a mutual fantasy about sex clubs. Enjoy…

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So far I’ve been silent on the horrorshow that is Goop – Gwyneth Paltrow’s bullshit-engine which advocates wellness ‘treatments’ designed to cure you of your money. She recommends anything from vaginal steaming (argh) to jade eggs, making ludicrous claims about how these things can help you ‘detox’ and generally improve your life. I haven’t bothered with it until now, but my Twitter feed is currently packed with news and snark about ‘Goop Lab’ – her new show where she demonstrates some of the pseudoscience she’s trying to flog you – so I’d feel negligent if I didn’t write something. What’s more, I recently realised this problem isn’t limited to Goop: a sex toy website that I otherwise have a lot of time for has started peddling weird bullshit along with its jade eggs, and it breaks my fucking heart. Let’s start by tackling jade eggs and other cuntstones, and why the dodgy claims about their magical powers aren’t just ‘harmless fun’. I’ll save vaginal steaming for another angry day.

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Question: what’s the difference between group sex and a gang bang? Please pop on your serious hat and ponder along with me. I’ve got DIAGRAMS and everything.

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This week’s guest blogger is Sara, who you’ll have met before in her amazing post about what happened when her girlfriend released her from chastity. Today’s guest blog contains an equally hot scenario and I am not sure what I love more about it: the sheer intense hotness of the fuck, or the skill and patience which was put in to making it perfect. As someone who’s a big fan of VR porn sex games, I am in absolute awe of what happens here, and I hope if you got similar gifts for Christmas, it might inspire you to see if you achieve similarly orgasmic things…

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Instead of resolving NOT to do something, how about making it your New Year’s resolution to do something cool? Inevitably, as a massive pervert, I reckon one of the coolest things you can do is hunt through your memory banks and come up with an idea for a guest blog – whether it’s a sexy one or something that’ll make people think, I would absolutely love to host your sex writing here in 2020. So for inspiration, here are a few of the most popular guest blogs from 2019…

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