Listen up, companies! I know you want to engage with bloggers, and get our sweet sweet Google Juice, but I’ve had an extraordinary number of requests recently from people asking me for paid ‘dofollow’ links, so I feel a PSA is necessary. Here goes: if you nag me for a paid ‘dofollow’ link, I will not work with you. Not just on your link building, but on anything.

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Yesterday I got a phone call, while I was in the middle of writing a Twitter thread. It was from my boyfriend, who had – in the process of trying to fix the door – accidentally locked himself in the bathroom. “Can you come upstairs and rescue me please?” he asked. Feeling like a knight in shining armour, making sacrifices for the greater cause of love, I broke off my tweeting and ran upstairs to help.

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This week’s guest blogger is here to talk about one of my current favourite things: audio porn! Ever since I started recording posts as audio, I’ve also been listening to more amazing audio work from other people, so when rmp792 got in touch with a view to writing about the GoneWildAudio community, I was really excited. Please welcome him and use the links at the bottom to explore more of his sexy work!

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My partner told me recently that ‘confidence is sexy’, and I nearly fell off my chair. Confidence, is sexy, you say? Wow, I wish someone had told me twenty years ago, because if I’d known I’d definitely have magicked up some confidence rather than deliberately chosen to be awkward and ashamed of the way I am…

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The phrase ‘mutual masturbation’ isn’t one of my favourites, to be honest. Something about the ‘mutual’ sounds too formal for me: it conjures images of ‘mutual societies’, and makes me feel as if I’m wanking alongside an ethical building society or the Co-op. But mutual masturbation is ridiculously fun, and I recently stumbled across a new way to do it that turned out to be hot as fuck, so I’m going to share it with you because I’m a very generous lover.

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