All Posts – Page 270
Good anal sex versus great anal sex
Anal sex is a topic I have done to death here before. If you’ve been reading for longer than a few weeks, you know that it’s one of my favourite things. The tightness of it, the promise of something deliciously taboo, the way he’ll whisper ‘good girl’ in my ear as I wriggle back onto his cock… unngh.
Are you cut out to be a sex writer?
Are you interested in sex? Do you enjoy the fact that humans have sex in different ways, with a number of different people, in a variety of interesting positions? If someone tells you about a cool new sex game or a fetish that’s new to you, is your first reaction to go ‘ooh, wow! That sounds interesting please tell me more’?
You might want to be a sex writer.
If any of the above things have made you recoil slightly, a frown of disgust on your face, or made you feel like you should hammer out a comment about how some people are just ‘sick’, ‘creepy’ or ‘gross’? Then I cannot stress this enough, but please:
do not become a sex writer.
“But I thought he was a nice guy?!”
This post – which includes frank discussion of rape and sexual assault, fyi – has been swirling round in my head for a while. I almost wrote it a few weeks ago, when student George Lawlor feigned horror at being asked to go to consent classes and held up a sign saying ‘this is not what a rapist looks like.’ Then I almost wrote it again after watching the BBC3 programme ‘Is this rape?’ Now a number of porn performers have come forward about James Deen and – because I think it’s important to support people who speak out – I figured now’s as good a time as any. I believe them, obviously. Please read their stories:
I don’t want to put words into their mouths or make any assumptions about their experience, which is why I’ve put all these links at the beginning of the post so you can read, and offer your own support however you like.
From now on the rest of this post is not specifically about any individual – just our response to hearing someone’s personal story of rape or assault. Specifically, it’s about this phrase:
“But I thought he was a nice guy?!”
It comes back to the George Lawlor thing: ‘This is not what a rapist looks like.’ Let me tell you about some nice guys I have known.
Don’t tell me sucking dick is easy
Today a guy wrote a Vice article about why he doesn’t want to eat pussy. There are a number of things I could say in response to his article, mostly involving swearwords, and desperate pleas that he stop repeating the same tedious bullshit that comes out whenever any straight bloke thinks he has a Scorching Hot Take on the subject of eating cunt.
As a general rule, my opinion on cunnilingus is that it’s not really my bag, but I’ll enjoy doing it to a lady if I’m fucking her. If you want to eat it, tuck in, but I won’t shame you if you’d rather not.
However, what I DO object to is the implication that it’s far more onerous to ask someone to give cunnilingus than it is to ask for a blow job. In the piece, the author says:
“The penis is a simple thing – it’s hard to get things completely wrong.”
To which I reply: HOW FUCKING HARD ARE YOU SHITTING ME, SUNSHINE?
Rimming – what does ass taste like?
This blog post was written in response to the question: are there any sex things that you don’t like? Here’s where my mind went first.
I am probably similar to a lot of British people who grew up in the late nineties, in that I first encountered rimming on Queer as Folk (the UK version, which is categorically better than the US version because of Stuart Alan Jones). In the first ever episode, Nathan (played by Charlie Hunnam when he was young and pre-beardy) gets naked and thoroughly fucked by the stunning Aidan Gillen. Amid the sweat and the panting and the deafening thud of my aching, hormonal cunt, I heard Stuart (Aidan Gillen) ask Nathan what he was into. Nathan pauses so Stuart prompts:
“Rimming?”
There’s a pause, as we realise that the young ‘un has absolutely no idea what that is. Still, he’s as horny as a teenager with a hot guy sweating all over him, so obviously he says yes. And the sight of Stuart’s tongue sliding wetly up and down Nathan’s back, eventually coming to rest in the crack of his buttocks is something I still occasionally kill kittens over.
But of course, alongside all my other thoughts – are there nerve endings there? Is it really pleasurable? If I asked him really nicely, would an Aidan Gillen lookalike ever do the same to me? – was the most important rimming-related question: what does it actually taste like?