All Posts – Page 277
Guest blog: softcore femdom fantasies
This week’s guest blog is a bit different, because I’m going to publish it and then – like an irritating pop-up critic – I’m going to disagree with the author.
Meet Mr XY. He got in touch with a blog about his specific fantasies – softcore femdom that follows certain lines, but doesn’t go as far as much of the femdom porn that he finds online. Domination without humiliation. Edging without hardcore chastity. I’ll let him explain the details.
However, I also want to add a note for those reading this – his post discusses the ways in which femdom is portrayed in the mainstream media, as well as a lament about the lack of porn available for people with his sensibilities. If you think the same, please do read my response at the end, because I definitely think there’s plenty of porn that caters to these fantasies, and it’s perhaps not as rare as the author thinks. Sometimes it’s just a question of knowing the right places to find it, so I thought it’d be worth us having a bit of back and forth.
As a result of my insistence on disagreeing, this blog is less of a straight-out story, and more the opportunity to start a bit of a discussion. So massive thank you to him, for letting me post his blog along with my thoughts, and please do come and join in the comments.
Girls who wear glasses: sexy as fuck
“Men don’t make passes at girls who wear glasses”? Pah. Maybe more will after reading this post. Here’s why glasses can be incredibly sexy, and a few hot things to do if you want to include glasses in your sex games…
How to get better at dating
It’s rare that I get the opportunity to offer a really specific piece of advice. As a general rule, when people email me to ask “how do I get laid though?” or “can you tell me how to make people fall in love with me?” my answers will be the kind of fence-sitting waffle you’d expect from someone who isn’t paid per word to clickbait. Because the truth is generally not very clickbait-friendly. “Top ten ways you suck at dating” sounds way better than “well everyone’s attracted to different things and it’s all a bit more complicated than that.”
However, every now and then, something arises on which I can offer solid, useful advice. I’m as shocked as you are, but here goes – my number one tip for being better at dating:
No blog today
Every week I post new blogs on Wednesday and Sunday. This week, for the first time in ages, I’m not putting one up. Sorry about that.
Sometimes life is too crowded. Sometimes I’m knackered. Sometimes things happen that mean the post which sounded perfect in my head just needs a bit more work. And sometimes I recognise the irony of ignoring sex in favour of writing about sex because Oh My God I Need To Get Something Live On Sunday.
So: today’s post will go up tomorrow. I will feel massive guilt, even though realistically the world won’t stop turning. If you’re horrified at my efficiency failing, please join my club: feel free to subscribe to get updates when new blogs go up in case I fuck up my schedule again in the future, or peruse the archives if you want some filth in the meantime.
I appreciate that believing people care even one tenth as much as I do is extraordinarily narcissistic. But I currently live in a cycle where I apologise for everything, so one thing extra can’t hurt.
Now I’m off to skive, and spend Sunday doing whatever people who don’t write sex blogs do on a Sunday. What… umm… what do people who don’t write sex blogs do on a Sunday? I’ll investigate.
Sorry.
G
x
Guest blog: interview with Shine Louise Houston
I’ve wanted to write about porn for a while, and when Shine Louise Houston got in touch about Snapshot – her latest crowdfunded erotic film, I thought it’d be an excellent excuse. So instead of a guest blog this week, Shine Louise was kind enough to answer some questions about her latest project: a feature-length erotic thriller.
If you pick up a newspaper – in the UK media at least – you’re likely to find that any discussion on porn is centered around a view of the porn industry as a homogenous whole. Big-name studios with questionable practices churning out easy, identikit films for a primarily straight male audience. This by no means an accurate picture. The general narrative that ‘porn is damaging/exploitative/bad/degrading’ is changing, albeit slowly – independent producers who make fairtrade porn, feminist porn, queer porn, and other films that don’t fit the stereotype – are getting more attention.
Since I started writing this blog, I’ve had the pleasure of meeting (and working with) brilliant porn producers like Pandora Blake and Petra Joy, and in turn they’ve recommended other porn producers who are creating unique and amazing films. One of these people is Shine Louise Houston, who founded Pink and White Productions – the company that produces the CrashPad Series (the Crash Pad is a secret apartment in San Francisco dedicated to hot, queer sex).
Let’s chat…