Dirty talk can be extremely intimidating to do, if you’re not used to it. But this guide isn’t about showing you how to weave narrative arcs and construct pitch-perfect cum-trigger sentences. This is the easiest guide to dirty talk in the English-speaking world, so if you currently say nothing (or almost nothing) during sex, I promise the following words and phrases will level you up. Don’t panic, don’t stress, don’t expect to go from monosyllabic grunts to suddenly channeling Casanova, just get yourself a few of these words.
Yes
You know this word. You use it all the time. Yes, you’d like a cup of tea. Yes, you’d like to come to your best friend’s birthday party. Yes, you really love the way this person has wrapped their lips round your cock. Yes, this feels good and you would like it to continue. Yes, that thing they’re doing right there? That’s hitting the spot. Yes. Yes. Yes.
Easiest dirty talk in the world. Don’t run before you can walk, and don’t try to come up with a groundbreaking erotic masterpiece before you’ve practiced saying ‘yes’ when things feel good. Go on, try it. Next time you’re fucking: say yes. Yes. Yes. Oh fuck yes.
More
You see where I’m going with this guide to dirty talk, right? I’m trying to tell you that sometimes, in the pursuit of perfection, we forget that simplicity can also hit the mark. Not sure what words to use for your partner’s junk? Worried you might call them something that ends up turning them off? Please take all these worries, place them on a high shelf far far away from where you’re fucking, and embrace the simplicity of ‘more.’
As in ‘more.’ That’s it. No need to elaborate – they know what they’re doing. Whether they have their face buried in your cunt or their dick buried right up to the hilt in your eager, squirming ass, I promise the person who is fucking you knows what ‘more’ means.
More. Yes. More.
Don’t stop
This thing they’re doing is fucking great, right? You want them to keep doing it? Humans need encouragement, especially if the thing they’re doing involves a tricky-to-hold position or holding their breath or anything approaching stamina. Doubly so if you think you’re close to coming and just a tiny bit more effort from them will tip you over the edge.
Want them not to stop? Say ‘don’t stop.’ Seriously, there’s a reason this is the easiest guide to dirty talk in the world. It’s very much ‘say what you want, in as few words as humanly possible.’ Trust the catch in your breath and the aching way you say it to carry the nuance that your words will not cover.
That’s so good
Slightly more advanced here, so bear with me: a three-word combo. And honestly, are there any better three-word combos to have whispered in your ear when you’re pounding someone into a quivering wreck? If something feels good, fucking say so. Just say it out of your filthy mouth. Three words: that’s so good. That’s so good. Don’t stop, don’t stop, fuck yes that’s good. More. Yes.
Please
If in doubt, remember your manners: say please. Someone’s giving you the good stuff? You want them to continue? Your whole body is aching with the need to be dumped over the edge of unreason and into shuddering orgasm? All you need is for them to just keep doing this thing oh God please keep doing it please please. PLEASE.
The easiest guide to dirty talk
Get what I’m doing here? I think when people hear ‘talk dirty to me’, they often freeze up in a panic, wondering just how to master the art of sexy speaking when their brain is focused elsewhere. I’ve read loads of guides to dirty talk (and written a fair few myself) which give tips on things like asking your partner what terms they prefer (do they call it their ‘cock’ or their ‘prick’, for instance, ‘cunt’ or ‘pussy’), how to build pace or construct a scenario. And dirty talk can definitely involve all these things if you want to be fancy about it. Sometimes dirty talk for me involves just narrating what’s going on in an eager babble of fuckdrunken dick-hunger. Other times it’ll mean whispering a fantasy at someone while they’re fucking me, imagining other people joining in or watching, and then the person I’m fucking builds on that and runs with it, adding more people or a gallon more spunk, and we tell the story together until one or both of us comes.
But look: that’s fucking advanced. And no reasonable person would expect you to go straight to that from silence. If you’ve spent most of your sex life using actions and noises, but never words, give yourself a break and start off with the easy shit. Open your mouth and let these words come out:
Yes. More. Don’t stop. That’s so good. Please.
Practice, practice, practice, and once these start coming naturally to you, you’ll soon find it’s actually harder to just stick to these phrases than it is to elaborate a little…
Yes, that’s it. Fuck yeah that’s good. That’s so fucking good, please don’t stop. Pleasepleaseplease.
From here, you might get the confidence to build in specifics…
Your dick feels so fucking good in my cunt. That hurts so good, please don’t stop. Give it to me slowly so I can really fucking savour it. Yes. Please. Oh fuck yeah please please give me your cum.
Sure, you’re not going to go winning any literary prizes for this (I do this for a living and so far only two people have ever given me a gold star), but it gets you used to opening your mouth during sex and letting a few words pour out. If it makes you feel any better for using only this small vocabulary: this is the vocab I default to when I’m shagging someone new whose internal horny fuckmap I have not yet familiarised myself with.
You can move on to more advanced dirty talk later if you fancy it, but if dirty talk scares the hell out of you, it’s more important to build your confidence saying something than it is to ensure that ‘something’ is perfect. Later, you can find out what your partner’s specific cum-triggers are and weave those into your chatting (for instance, if they enjoy it when you beg them for cum, or [this next bit is so hot I had to have a wank as soon as I wrote it down] offering them your cum, tell them how much they’re stretching/filling you, or how dirty they are, or what have you), but right now we’re just gonna go with the absolute rock-bottom basics.
None of these words on their own are likely to turn someone off, or yank them out of the moment: they’re just simple ways to express the good time you’re having, and encourage your partner to keep on dishing out the good stuff.
More. Yes. Please. That’s so good. That’s so. Fucking. Good.
If you want to translate this into other languages, I would massively get off on that. Feel free to reproduce/translate, and link back here. Let me know you’ve done it and I’ll link back to you too.
17 Comments
Part of dirty talk is about active consent and part is showing a path and expressing want and limits.
Your vocabulary is about active consent. We also need the « I want / I need / change this to please me” side of the coin
For dirty talk that has both I miss stuff like
“If you (do …) it’s so good”
“More of (…)”
I really like it if (…)
“I want you to (…)
I am a bit troubled because imagine giving only your choice of words to beginners (teens/teens/whatever age). We’d risk that they/we can’t express limits and consent.
Oh nooooooo please don’t do this! First thing’s first: absolutely nothing on my site is written for teens – my site is strictly for over 18s, and I would absolutely never give anyone sex advice who is under the age of 18. Even here, where what I’m writing is a guide, I’ve made it kinda horny, because that’s what I do, and so it’s not ethical to share anything on my site with people under 18 for sex ed purposes, just as it wouldn’t be ethical to show them porn in a classroom. For young ‘uns: https://bishuk.com
I think what you’re talking about here is sexual *communication*, and that’s not the same as dirty talk. Dirty talk = say hot things to turn your partner on. Sexual communication = learn how to articulate your needs/desires/limits. They’re very different things, with very different purposes, and if we conflate the two then we both ruin dirty talk and also make sexual communication less effective (because it’s suddenly getting wrapped up in ‘say things that turn your partner on’ in ways that really do make it more difficult to say ‘no’ clearly or articulate limits). I know this kind of communication is important, it’s vital (and I do write a lot about this too! eg https://www.girlonthenet.com/blog/sexual-communication-why-what/) but I think it’s also important to be able to write about the hot stuff without having to make it a foundational exercise in basic consent at the same time.
Sorry, I’m not having a go, because you raise an important issue. But I think we’re maybe going to disagree on where ‘dirty talk’ and ‘basic sexual communication’ cross over, and that’s why I want to push back a little. Also, the teen thing: seriously my site is absolutely not for teens, and I also don’t think that we should be teaching under-18s how to dirty talk. We definitely *should* teach them sexual communication, though.
GOLD STAR :D
Love the simplicity of this advice – for all my online sexytime bravado I can go very very quiet when trying to do dirty talk :D x x
I’ve never been the most vocal person in bed, but my husband mentioned that I say his name in full (Christopher, rather than Chris) when I’m about to come when he’s fucking me. I hadn’t realised, being too far into a sexual coma at that point to know.
It became a trigger word for him to get him off, and I now drop it into sex to mean “harder”, or “go for it” or the like. And it really does it for him, so he goes at it harder and goes for it and… then apparently I’m saying his name in full without knowing it, jizzing everywhere and he’s jizzing inside my arse and, oh…
So, yes, yes, yes to every word of this post. Dirty talk doesn’t require the plot from Pride and Prejudice or the verbal skills of Cicero. Just one word can do it. And does do it. And… you know, I’m so hot now because of your post, I think I’ll be saying one word tonight. Repeatedly.
Saying his name in full has become a cum-trigger for him? This is hotter than the actual sun, good lord. Incredible. I wanted to write a longer comment worthy of how hot that is but instead I might have to go for a lie down.
I spent a good ten to fifteen years not being particularly vocal during sex but can encourage people by saying that once you start and get over those initial hurdles at outlined above then it’ really starts to *cough* flow.
Like Jamie I have a bit of a trigger word…I’m a big fan of the word “SluTTT” during sex. I have typed it like that as I love the T at the end being accentuated into a really hard T. I enjoy the word in general too as it conjures up images of a sex positive, empowered, vampy, frippet (in my mind at least) and much preferred to the more derogatory “slag”*
*not that there is anything wrong with the word “slag”. Just not one of my personal favourites YMMV.
Oh God yeah. I currently have quite a big *thing* for the word ‘slut’ – the drawl of the start with plosive t at the end just… yeah, it’s good. I use the word ‘slag’ a lot, but more for fun/chat than dirty talk, because the word itself just isn’t nearly as satisfying to say. Incidentally, ‘frippet’ is a new one on me, so thank you! It’s light and trippy and I might start to use that too =)
I only started doing this a few years ago, and the effect is incredible. I started with simple stuff like “open your legs, I want to stroke you” then “you” became “your cunt”. Then descriptions like “your cunt is wet, very wet. It’s running down my cock..” and questions like “you feel wet, but tight. It makes me hard. Can you feel how hard it makes me ? “.
The other day after a very nice meal out and more wine than usual, I was fucking from behind, and used the ‘open your legs’ line. Then I added “I’m stroking your cunt, but I wish I could lick you while my cock is deep inside you”. The effect was electric, and she started to come, and it left me thinking…. “oh, here we have an imaginary threesome!”
So I agree. Words. Because they can unlock the power of the imagination.
With big thanks to a mate of mine who speaks German (though would like me to include the caveat that he isn’t a native speaker), here are some of the phrases from the post…
GOTN auf Deutsch
die Grundbegriffe:—
JA
MEHR
HÖR NICHT AUF
DAS IST SO GEIL
BITTE
für fortgeschrittene Nutzung:—
rühren mich an… ja, wie das
mach mich zu deine schmutzige kleine Schlampe
ja, wie das, das ist so verdammt gut, bitte hör nicht auf, bittebittebitte
dein Schwanz fühlt so verdammt gut in meine Fotze, das verletzt so gut, bitte hör nicht auf. gib mir das langsam, damit ich es wirklich verdammt genießen kann. ja. bitte. oh fick, ja, bitte bitte gib mir dein Sperma.
bitte spritz mir ins Gesicht / bitte spritz mir an die Fotze
fülle meine Kehle mit dein Schwanz
Do you speak any other languages? Can you translate some dirty talk into them? I would absolutely love that. Feel free to post here in comments or on your own site and drop me a link!
I’m gonna have a crack at Japanese, but I don’t have a kana keyboard so you’re getting it in romaji
Hai (yes)
Motto (more)
Yamenaide (don’t stop)
Sore wa ii ne/Ii kanji desu (the latter here is more ‘that feels good’ but I think in Japanese that would feel more natural than ‘sore wa ii ne’ – sadly I have never fucked in Japanese so I might need someone else to weigh in here, especially on whether ‘kanji’ is the right tone for a fuck)
Onegaishimasu/Onegai (the former here feels way too formal, but formality is kink in my mind so I’ve included it)
I’ll be in my bunk
Some Lithuanian – (please note these are my approximations as to phonetic spelling, I was not taught these in a classroom setting)
“Leisk paciulpti tavo bybi” – please can I suck your cock
“Isdulkink man-e prasau” – fuck me please
“Nuleisk man ant papu” – come on my tits
“Nuleisk man I burna” – come in my mouth
Fucking LOVELY, thank you! <3
Some Portuguese (not my native language, but I double checked with my Brazilian friend)
‘Isso’ (with the stress on the first syllable) – it means ‘that’ but is a better substitution for ‘yes’ I think than ‘Sim’ which is the literal translation (though you can use that if you really want).
‘Muito bom’- means ‘very good’
‘Adoro isso’- I love that
‘Mais’ – more (though my Portuguese friend suggests ‘dá-me mais’ (give me more) or ‘fode me mais’ (fuck me more)
‘Por favor’- please (but this isn’t used during sex, at least in Portugal, where it would be better to say something more like ‘continua assim’ (keep going).
‘Não para’ – don’t stop
I’ll update if I get more information!
Incredible, thank you so much!!
Holy shit what happened to the formatting?! (Sorry – really no idea what happened!)
Aaaand courtesy of Eve + ObsessionRouge on Twitter, here in French…
Oui
Encore / Vas y (More / go on)
T’arrête pas
C’est trop bon
Pitié (please – more begging than s’il te plaît, which would be a bit weird to say)