Girl on the Net

I have a BONUS guest blog for you today, courtesy of the fab sex blogger The Other Livvy. She’s teaming up with some other sex bloggers for a ‘Smutathon’ – writing dirty stories for two excellent charitable causes.

Smutathon: dirty stories for good causes

‘Oh, I just have a hobby blog. I post a lot of photos and occasionally review toys. Mostly I write about what interests me or what turns me on!’

And just like that, as if I didn’t already know, I realised that I have the best hobby in the world! It’s not a hobby that I can list on my CV, no matter how proud I am of it, but having a sex blog is brilliant and inspiring and enlightening, and is genuinely the best thing that I have ever done.

I realise that if you’re reading this, I am essentially preaching to the converted and I know that publicly writing about sex isn’t for everyone, but the inclusivity and positivity that I’ve experienced since I started writing is so important that I wanted to take the opportunity to celebrate it.

I am writing this on a train on my way back from Birmingham after the first of what I hope will be a series of ‘Lube and a Laptop’ meet ups for sex bloggers and erotic writers. Just like after Eroticon, the sex writers conference in London, my bag is bulging with new sex toys, lube samples, and erotic and feminist books, my phone is buzzing with new contacts and messages from friends, and my mind is overflowing with new ideas. More importantly, I am really happy. It’s a happiness built on spending time with truly amazing people but also one that has its foundations in feeling completely accepted.

Do you know what that’s like? To feel that everything about you is OK? That you can be any size or any shape or any colour and be accepted? That you can be any gender or any sexual orientation or have any kink and not be shamed for your choices? I really hope you do!

In my experience, which I know may not be everyone’s experience, sex bloggers, sex workers and erotic writers are the best kind of people to be around because you can be anyone or anything that you want to be and it’s OK. It’s more than OK, it’s valued. YKINMKBYKIOK, or ‘your kink is not my kink but your kink is OK’, is a mouthful of an acronym but is such a wonderful attitude to hold, and one that is widely accepted within the sex positive community. Whatever you’re in to, whatever turns you on, whoever you are is OK with us if it’s OK with you. I know that my privileged position as a vanilla-ish cishet women means that I don’t need this acceptance as much as some, but I am still comforted by the knowledge that it exists.

Sex bloggers are also the most fucking amazing caring giving inclusive generous bunch of people I've ever known. #LubeAndALaptop

— C-K (@CoffeeAndKink) June 24, 2017

And, oh my gosh, writing about sex is just so much fun! I started my blog because it was what I needed at the time. I was having a crisis of confidence about sex and my own sexuality, feeling confined in my conservative upbringing and lost in perpetual singledom. I couldn’t work out why nothing I was doing felt right and lacked the confidence or knowledge to know how to change. But then I found sex bloggers and erotic writers – I found stories and essays about exactly what I was feeling, I read meltingly hot fiction and true stories of kinks and pleasures that I’d never even imagined, I learned what turned me on and what I liked, and everything changed.

Now I write because it’s fun. It’s hot and sexy and confidence building and just so much fun! And through sex blogging, I have met some brilliant people, had some amazing experiences, made some extraordinary friends and met the love of my life. Not bad for a hobby!

It is in this spirit that I have hijacked Girl on the Net’s blog because I wanted to tell you about Smutathon. Coffee and Kink has organised a fundraising event that is taking place on July 1st. In the twelve hours between noon and midnight, sex writers from all over the country will be furiously writing filth for you to raise money for two great causes:

• Backlash UK, which provides pro-bono legal advice and campaigns for legal sexual freedom for consenting adults
• Rape Crisis England and Wales, an organisation that promotes the needs and rights of women and girls who have experienced sexual violence, to improve services to them and to work towards the elimination of sexual violence.

I am so excited about it and can’t wait to get started!

So if you’re interested in reading a ridiculous amount of smut, check out the hashtag #Smutathon2017. There are links to the bloggers taking part and what they’ve written so far plus bonus photos that have been posted to celebrate the money raised already.

And, more importantly, if you like what you read and want to support us and these causes, please donate. After everything that sex blogging has done for me and for so many people, it feels right to give something back!