Girl on the Net

This week’s guest blogger is the fabulous Valery North – a fellow sex blogger who has written beautifully here before about the way haes body’s sexual response has changed over time, as well as shared a gorgeous extract from haes book – ‘Not to choose‘. Valery got in touch recently to let me know hae’d tried out a cool and unique toy from one of my site sponsors. Having dreamt of discovering a rimming sex toy for a while, how would hae get on with this kickass little licking simulator? Read on to find out…

Can I find the rimming sex toy of my dreams?

As I sit down to write this post, I am imagining my buttocks resting firmly on the face of a desperate little sub boy. He simultaneously squeals for mercy and diligently applies his tongue to my dirty (figuratively) tight fundament, frantically waggling it back and forth in an effort to please me enough that I will wank him off when I finally decide to lift my behind and give him free access to air again.

It is, of course, a fantasy. But one accompanied by genuine physical sensations. The sensations are provided by the Control Rim Joy By Sir Richard’s, which I ordered for myself from GotN’s sponsor Meo a few weeks ago. Suffice to say, I’ve had my eye on this toy for a while.

All things anal

My horny fascination with butt stuff began almost as soon as I learned that the arsehole could be a source of sexual stimulation. The idea both of being the one plunging my cock into another person’s hot, dark hole or equally, being the one taking someone’s raging hard-on or strap-on in my own ample rear, drew me in a way that few other purely sexual scenarios did – BDSM in its many and varied forms is just as hot, and I am sure my interest in anal play hinges in many ways on the same sorts of emotional and physical significance.

When I had money to spend on sex toys, 9 times out of 10 if I wasn’t buying chains, cuffs, floggers and the like, then I was looking at butt plugs, dildos and vibrators that I could try stuffing into my rectum and fucking myself with, or wearing around and feeling that wonderful stretching, fullness that feels like it goes right to the root – genuinely fundamental, if you will.

There was just one thing that wasn’t quite working with all this. And it was the whole issue of vibration.

Better butt buzzing

In general, I have yet to find an affordable automated toy made for penis-having people that really works for me. It is possible that the JETT system by Hot Octopuss might, and believe me, I’m saving up to see if the direct vibrations to the cock will have an impressive effect. But I’m writing about butt things today, so we’ll leave that for another day.

A buzzing vibrator in my butt really doesn’t do a lot for me. The sensation is okay, but doesn’t really achieve much except it makes my bowels feel looser – which might be good prep for other, bigger, toys, but in itself is not a direct turn-on, the way simply having something up there is.

And I started to dream of a toy that would stimulate my rear, maybe with or without penetration, but something that I could use as hands-free and let it really get me going.

At the 2019 Eroticon gathering, Tabitha Rayne kindly gave me a Ruby Glow at reviewer’s price for me to experiment with the notion that the sit-on vibe designed to stimulate the vulva, might also provide hot sexy vibrations to a cock base or anal ring muscle. As she said at the time, “there aren’t enough rimming toys in the world.” As with so many things, I concluded my review of the Ruby Glow with the idea that there could be ways to make a properly targeted butt toy for rimming simulation.

For a couple of years, in answering a sex toy survey, when they asked “what toy would you like to see that doesn’t exist yet?” I would describe my dream of a sit-on rimming/perineum stimulating toy.

And then, last year (I believe for the Black Friday sale), GotN linked her sponsors Meo, and I went exploring their site.

I didn’t have the money then, but I do now.

Ride-on rimming sex toy

So, I find myself riding the face of my imaginary sub boy (why a boy? Probably because Meo market their toys for gay men and penis-havers generally. Even the hardcore S&M stuff that could in theory be used by any genders) and getting off to the idea of their sexy “protests” as they burrow as deep as they can into my anal ring, working hard and giving me fantastic sensations right in the core of my arse.

Why sexy protests and squeals? Well, the toy’s motor is quite noisy, and when I muffle it between my big fat buttocks and let my weight rest on it, it sounds like it’s whimpering for mercy. What can I say? I can even work that sort of thing into my fantasy when I really want to get turned on!

I love this toy, I love sitting at my computer thinking and writing dirty thoughts, while my fantasy boy sub tries his hardest to make me come without touching my cock.

And the best bit about it is that it felt like nothing else – it is a unique sensation from a sex toy as far as I know. I’m pretty sure it also doesn’t feel like a real tongue busying itself with down there, but that’s not the point. It’s another broadening of erotic experience, and an exciting addition to the variety of hot, sexy things I can make my butt feel when I’m in the mood.

The rimming sex toy quest continues

It’s still not actually quite what I hoped for. As if anything ever is! This toy is not strictly speaking designed as a hands-free sit-on toy the way the Ruby Glow is, so you know, there’s a gap there still that remains unfilled.

The tongue’s motion is very much back-and-forth, where I had imagined it would be more circular, the way “rimming” sounds as a verb, and looks on some of the porn vids I’ve sought out (and bought – pay for your porn, folks). I would absolutely be in the market for a toy very like this one that had different patterns of movement (ring, figure-of-eight, side-to-side, front-to-back, etc), not just different tempo/rhythm patterns.

So although I am not at the end of my quest for the perfect automated rimming sex toy – I have found new signposts, now hints of what to seek next, and ideas to try. I don’t know if I will ever find the perfect sex toy for me, or if such a thing is possible after all. I don’t mind either way, because I like the journey. I like the sensations, and I encourage anyone who’s into butt stuff like I am to try the Control Rim Joy By Sir Richard’s for yourself.

Maybe, one day, someone will make the true buttlicking device of the ages, the one that will truly stimulate like none other. Until that day, I shall continue to enjoy the wild variety of anal play that’s available right now.

You can pick up the Control Rim Joy By Sir Richard’s direct from Meo for $136.62. Meo sponsors my website which means if you buy through them you’re helping to support this site and pay fabulous guest bloggers like Valery for their work.