Category Archives: Unsolicited advice
Support trans people: respond to the GRA consultation
As a cisgender person, it’s hard to talk about trans rights in the UK without sounding either like a patronising arse (of course trans people should be able to access their rights! Don’t you realise trans people are people too?) or like I’m fishing for some kind of medal (of course trans people should be able to access their rights! Where’s my cookie?). As a result, I end up doing a weird fudge where I retweet links to things like the GRA consultation without ever writing about it in depth, because all the words I bash out onto the page seem like arsery or medal-fishing. But there are only a few days left to fill out the GRA consultation, and this is one of those rare opportunities where you get to spend a little bit of time making a tangible difference to something important, so here goes.
Vagina, mouth or neither: The Bargain Stroker Blind Wank Test
What do you get if you take six masturbation sheaths, two pairs of hands, a blindfold and a bottle of lube? Well, apart from ‘an excellent Saturday night’ you also get to learn some surprising new things about what makes a good stroker. Regular readers will know that I’m on a neverending quest to gather every possible piece of data on how to pleasure a dick. So naturally, strokers are one of my favourite sex toys. Having tested out a variety of them – from the Rolls-Royce pricey strokers to simpler, bargain strokers and even stroking machines I’ve customised myself – the time was ripe to inject a bit of science into the selection. Welcome to the Bargain Stroker Blind Wank Test.
How to be a sex blogger: busting some myths
What does it take to be a sex blogger? Do you have to be a wildly kinky adventurer, ready to fuck a new person each night and spend your weekend testing new butt plugs? Fuck no. Let’s tackle some common sex blogger myths, and in the process give a vague nod to the fact that this month marks my SEVEN YEAR blogging anniversary.
Consent negotiation doesn’t only happen once
What do you do when you’re nervous in front of the person you love the most? When you’ve spent weeks having awkward, painful arguments in which neither of you really knows the right words to say to fix things? Some people might go out for dinner or to a movie – something traditional and date-y, to remind each other that they can still have fun. Others might share a bottle of wine and have a deep and meaningful chat – re-establishing your shared goals and reminding each other how much love there is between you. We play Magic: The Gathering.
Relationship myths: the biggest lies we’re told about love
The biggest lie we’re told about love is that the start of it is actually The End. The trial and strife and struggle of your day-to-day smooths out into plain sailing when you’ve someone beside you. You’ve walked into the sunset, and you live there now. It’s warm and calm, like the end of a summer’s day. Both of you have made it and you’re safe. The other relationship myths I’ve been told pale in comparison to this one: that love is easy, once you’re in it.