Category Archives: The human body

Things that don’t happen in porn that happen in real life

After he’s come, he likes to stay inside me. Chatting and whispering and feeling the post-fuck squeezes of my cunt when I giggle. I used to think this was rom-com bullshit – too cheesy and cute for me to bear. But fuck it, it makes him happy, so it’s crept into my repertoire – this post-fuck clinch with him inside me and me enveloping his cock. It’s one of a number of things that don’t tend to happen in porn.

(more…)

My vagina smells great: an ode to genital odour

How good do your genitals smell right now? Go on: if you’re in a place where it’s OK to do so, have a quick scratch and sniff. Really breathe it in. I bet a not insignificant number of you are delighted by the results. I’m certainly one of them: my vagina smells great at the moment.

(more…)

Experiential erotica: battling anxiety to try out mindful audio porn

I love audio porn, but I’m a very fidgety and anxious person. So when I listened to erotica that began with guided meditation, I was worried I might not make it past the first five minutes. But can I get over my anxiety if there’s erotic joy at the end of it? Here’s what happened when I tried experiential erotica…

(more…)

Irregular periods, fifty shades of discharge and other vaginal admin

Although I’m very pleased with my vagina, I do wish someone had told me, when I was young, just how much of my life I’d spend worrying about all the stuff that happened to drip out of it. Not that I resent the dripping exactly, it’s just I never anticipated there’d be so much of it. And that thanks to irregular periods and other vaginal surprises, it’s entirely unpredictable.

(more…)

What if I never have sex again?

I haven’t had sex for over three weeks. I can’t remember the last time I did, either. Not the position or the length or the time of day, or even whether I came. Maybe we started with a soft blow job. Perhaps it began with his hands down my knickers or me begging him to watch porn and touch himself for me. I can’t remember when I last had sex, or how. And now I’m wondering: what if I never had sex again?

(more…)