Note: this post includes a sexy role-play scenario which touches on somnophilia (fucking someone while they sleep) and is only ever hot with someone I trust absolutely, with whom I’ve discussed this kink in the past, who knows how I can withdraw consent if I want to. It is not – and should never be – a ‘how to’ guide on fucking. Don’t do this unless you have the express consent of the person with whom you’re doing it. 

Please try not to judge me when I tell you that sometimes I like guys to fuck me while I’m pretending to be asleep. I like the idea that they’re so horny they just want to slip it inside and grunt their frustration out on me, spitting cum inside me without bothering to wake me up first. Something about it ticks the same boxes as the idea of being a fly-on-the-wall for someone else’s wank. That intensely private, pleasure-hunting-at-all-costs urgency that someone leans into when they allow themselves to let go, with a side-order of actual dick in me. Yum.

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Is there any advice you could give your partner(s) that applies equally to your sexual life and your romantic life? As a general rule, my answer would be ‘no’, because in bed I want to be used and degraded but outside it I want support and kindness and equality. However, recently I realised there’s one broad rule that might apply to almost every aspect of interacting with me: the tighter you hold me, the harder I struggle.

This post features discussion of anxiety and also a real-life scene with elements of consensual non-consent. I know, right? I contain multitudes. If you like the idea of struggle-fucking as described in this post, know you’re gonna need to put the work in first: talk to your partner in detail about what you both want, and how you can withdraw consent if you want to. 

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He’s really cool, of course. Sweet and thoughtful and politically angry in good ways, not to mention kind and fun. He’s an excellent cook and he has lovely hands and he sometimes picks me up which makes me squirm. But I think, if pressed, what I like best about him at this very moment is that sometimes he makes me say ‘please.’

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I am fuckdrunk yet again. My legs are limp and my muscles weak and my throat is parched and all I can feel is the throbbing satisfaction in my cunt. For a split second I wonder if I’m making poor decisions, then I realise that fuckdrunk me could not possibly care less. Thinking straight is not as fun as being high on dick.

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There’s usually a moment during a fuck where I can sense a change in pace from the dude who is fucking me: a slight increase in speed, or a pause, that can mean he’s on the verge of coming. At this point, what I really want to do is start begging for cum. Tell him ‘please god yes fucking squirt your cum inside me.’ But it’s a pretty risky strategy.

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