Girl on the Net

It’s late, and I’m tired. So tired, in fact, that I’ve just slept through the last twenty minutes of the film we were meant to be watching. You can’t blame me: it’s not often I get to snuggle up on a sofabed with my head in somebody’s lap, sinking into the duvet and enjoying the gentle, rhythmic stroke of their hand on my bottom and thighs. It is blissful. Beautiful. Like stepping into a shower that’s set to the perfect temperature, or hugging a loved one when you meet them off the train. I am safe, cosy, happy. This scene is tranquil as fuck, so you can’t blame me for falling asleep. I am also a horny bitch, though, so I hope you can also understand what happens next.

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New Year is one of my favourite times, because it is a nice opportunity to do a bit of self-reflection. Looking back at the last 12 months and working out what you’ve achieved, what you’ve been lucky enough to experience, and what you’d like to leave behind as you move into the next year. 2025 has been a weird one for me, and I’ve spent a fair amount of time in some dark places. But reflecting on how I felt this time last year is a nice reminder that things can and do get better. And even while I was dwelling (some might say ‘wallowing’) in the darkness, I kept writing and recording and commissioning with the pleasantly surprising result that there’s a phenomenal crop of amazing guest audio porn, guest blogs and posts from me to include in this year’s round-up.

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I don’t know who needs to hear this, but some of you will so I’ll say it. That thing you’ve been itching to do for ages? You should do it on your own.

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As someone who had sex for the first time impulsively, reading this guest blog made me feel like I’d missed out on something really cool. I am so grateful to this guest blogger for sharing her experience of first time sex – the knowledge that you’re about to do this thing comes with such resonance and power. And she’s captured it in quite breathtaking detail. Please welcome this week’s anonymous guest, and join me in the thrilling journey that she takes us on, as she describes that feeling of being filled and fucked for the very first time.

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I woke up last Thursday with the loveliest, softest feeling: like I’d just had a truly sexy dream. It was hyper-realistic, and that realism lingered in my mind as I opened my eyes. Snuggling down beneath the duvet in a winter-warm bed, I ran hands over my body and allowed the details to return to me piece by piece.

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