This week’s guest blog is by a fantastic fellow blogger – Isabelle Lauren. She writes with touching candour about sex and libido after having a hysterectomy. It’s a brilliant piece, and it gave me an insight into not only one of the ways in which sex can be a struggle, but also about how vital patience and communication are when dealing with sexual difficulties. Check out her brilliant blog (and in particular this recent piece on the sex/violence distinction for over-18 content, which I really enjoyed) and follow her on Twitter @RomanticIsa.

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Most of my sex fantasies include some anal fucking somewhere: pushing back against someone’s cock to slide it all the way in… being told I’m a ‘good girl’ for taking something bigger than I usually would… or just being told to lube up and brace myself. Unnngh… hot. And yet despite this I can’t remember the last time I actually had anal sex.

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I am ridiculously excited about today’s guest blog – as you can probably tell by the fact I’m posting it on Monday as opposed to Friday when other guest blogs go up. Valery North – who has written here before on how your physical responses to sex toys can change as you get older – has just published a book! Not to Choose is a BDSM relationship novel about kinky sex, feminism and one person’s spiritual faith. And the extract that Valery has sent to give you a taster of the book is ridiculously hot, and very much my cup of tea. Or my cup of ‘vigorous, intense BDSM fuck’, if you will…

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This might sound a little weird to you, but when I conjure up sex fantasies I, personally, am not in them. Usually they feature a guy (or two, or three) that I’ve cast from a set of characters in my head – army sergeant, angry teacher, dominant dude on a conference call and … a woman who does not look like me. I didn’t realise this was unusual, until I had a conversation with someone about it, then ran some polls on Twitter to ask: do you, yourself, star in your sex fantasies?

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Good sex writing should – in my opinion – make you do something. Breathe a little faster, maybe. Reach into your pants, sometimes. Get in touch with someone you’ve been lusting after for ages… Well, this week’s guest blog made me squirm and wriggle and blush a bit while I was reading, then crave a little of this kind of scene myself. So please give a blushing, warm welcome to today’s guest blogger – international Mistress and courtesan Valerie August – with a story about how sometimes even a professional Mistress might need a little nurturing and discipline to guide her…

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