As part of my run of getting sex toy blog posts written up so you know what to buy before Christmas, let’s get stuck into this quickly so you’ve plenty of time to shove one in your basket. There are two things I love about the Pillow Talk Sassy vibe (kindly sent to me by my site sponsor The Pleasure Garden). The first is its simplicity. The second is that when I first had a wank with it, I came in under thirty seconds.

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Recently I wrote the easiest guide to dirty talk in the English-speaking world. I am a fan of trying to simplify sex things to get more people on board with doing them, and I am quite proud of that guide – I reckon people who’ve never talked dirty before might find it useful. I thought I’d have a go at doing something similar for sex comms more generally. And this one’s even simpler: all you need is three words. One phrase. Learn it, and get instantly better at sexual communication. Ready? Brace yourself…

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Inside you there are two wolves. One of the wolves is slutty-as-hell. She wants to get fucked and fucked up: suck dicks, swallow cum, be brutally whipped and beaten by a parade of eager partners. Have someone hold her nose while she chokes on cock, and have someone else slide butt plugs into her ass to make her cunt tighter while she’s pounded. The other wolf wants to be loved.

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It’s that time of year again, and honestly while I wanna adopt a world-weary tone of ‘oh God yet more sex toy sales’, it’d be churlish of me to do that because this genuinely is one of the best times of year to pick up some bargains. This page is going live with the currently available sex toy deals and I’ll update it each time another site sponsor opens up their Black Friday sex toy deals, so keep an eye on the page.

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I’m delighted to welcome this week’s guest blogger, who is here to talk about their wide range of dating experiences. What’s different about dating when you’re perceived as a cis woman vs a gay man? And although no experience is universal, are there any dating experiences that come close to that? Please welcome Mel McGovern, a non-binary dating enthusiast who you can find on Patreon, on Twitter @futurephoria, and on Instagram @futurephoria.

CN: brief mentions of rape

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