Tag Archives: breasts
What it feels like to have tits
Almost every guy I have ever dated has told me that if they had tits themselves, they’d spend all day just staring at and playing with them. I am not getting ready to snark, or shame anyone for saying this, in fact I completely understand. Tits are fucking awesome. The thing that makes me horniest about my own body is the excellent rack stuck to the front of it. Although I don’t spend all day groping them or staring (I’m a busy girl), I do spend a fairly sizeable chunk of my time being aware of them – enjoying how they look and feel – so I thought I’d have a go at answering the unspoken question hovering beneath all those comments from all those past boyfriends. Here’s what it feels like to have tits.
Note: I’m a cis woman who has mostly dated cis dudes. I’ve tried not to be too gendered in this because tits are not exclusive to one gender, but my perspective is naturally coloured by my experiences.
Guest blog: Who’s the Bos – an udderly delicious hucow story
Another incredible guest blog this week from Jenby, this time about a type of pet play that is genuinely new to me – more research into this required, because as soon as I read her post I immediately understood why this is so fucking sexy and compelling. ‘Hucow’ is a form of kinky pet play in which one person plays a dairy cow. Crucially ‘dairy’, because they are milked. Mmmmm… milked. Naturally, being able to literally produce one’s own milk is something of a bonus when it comes to becoming a hucow…
Note: contains ‘Mummy’ as an honorific. All participants are well over the age of 18. And also human, obvs.
Guest blog: Milk made – my lactation journey
I almost don’t need to write intros for these posts, because I figure all I need to do is ring a giant bell and shout “HEY HEY! JENBY IS BACK!” and you know that what is coming will be fun, hot, and creatively kinky. Her most recent piece was an incredibly horny account of using the new hot pink Doxy to give her girlfriend ‘full-on eye-rolling, spasming, practically-levitating-from-demonic-possession’ orgasms. Today’s guest blog is especially incredible, because she is talking about how she came to get her body to do something that I’ve always been fascinated by (and never done myself) – lactation! Note before we begin that Jenby is going to explain how she managed to start lactating, and that involves certain drugs that help to stimulate milk production – nothing in this post (or anywhere on this blog) constitutes medical advice though, so if you’re hoping to go on the same journey yourself please do talk to a doctor before you begin. This post also contains ageplay and the use of ‘Mommy’ as an honorific – all participants are consenting adults.
Guest blog: The love story between me and my breasts
I’m so excited about this week’s guest blog, because it’s a gorgeous exploration of the relationship between the guest blogger and her body, specifically her breasts. Please welcome Jannette Davies, from Scarlet Ladies Talk.
Jannette co-founded Scarlet Ladies in February 2015, and together with her co-founder Sarah Beilfuss, she runs events where women can openly discuss and explore their sexuality and bodies – and dispel a few myths along the way. Their events have got lots of people talking, and they sound like a lot of fun. Their next event is Body Bliss – a day-long retreat in London aimed at helping you explore – and hopefully fall in love with – your body.
Her story is personal, funny and relatable: all the things I like best.
How fashionable are your tits?
My tits are sort-of-round-ish, perhaps not as firm as they were when I was nineteen, and they have nipples that sit a little bit lower on the breast than I believe is currently fashionable. They’re probably a bit bigger than they were when I was young, which I think makes them a bit more fashionable, and because I am a white girl who barely gets out in the sun, I never have tit tan-lines. Which is great because as far as I understand it, tan lines are less acceptable than no tan lines, in this year of our Lord 2016.
Does that paragraph sound a bit weird to you? Like I am rambling drunkenly on a subject which should by no rights even exist? Of course. Yet all you need to do is look at some old-school porn to realise that there are distinct fashions in what we expect people’s bodies to look like.
I’m not talking here about hair – beards, bushes and fantastic 80s perms all seem to pop in and out of porn fashion depending on the country and the year. Things like body hair can be changed, so although naturally it’s shit that anyone’s expected to either grow or shave their hair, to a certain extent fashions are inevitable. I’m about as fashion-conscious as a dead rat in Marks and Spencer, but I do understand that for many people fashion is fun. You can play around with your clothes, hair, make up etc: making yourself look scary-executive-badass one minute and rainbow-coloured-punk-prince the next. Ace. Likewise when you’re picking your sexy look, you can have all-over body hair one minute, and the next decide you want to wax half of it off leaving just a hairy heart shape in the middle.
But there are also fashions for what breasts should look like. And that is WEIRD, people. Really fucking weird.