If there’s a topic on which I’m likely to bond with almost anyone in the world, it’s suckjobs. Take note, lest you and I are ever stuck in a lift together and need to make smalltalk for a few hours till the fire brigade comes, opening with ‘I love giving blowjobs, how about you?’ will guarantee we fill the time without ever needing to mention how the weather’s been lately. This week’s guest blogger has this in common too – JD loves giving blowjobs, and is here to explain in delicious and sexy detail exactly what’s so hot about them. Sadly, as a bisexual AMAB person (AMAB = assigned male at birth), in order to indulge in their love of cocksucking, JD has had to put up with a hefty amount of biphobia and other fuckery from the people whose dicks they’re sucking. Here today with the perfect blend of ‘horny content’ and ‘important education on how not to be a cock when you’re getting your dick sucked’, they explain…

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Listen up, my friend. Come closer. I have something very important to tell you. Your dick is fucking fantastic. Really, truly outstanding. Since the first time I grasped it through the fabric of your boxers I knew: this dick will work wonders. It’s a memorable cock. It literally sparks fucking joy. That same dick can also, I assure you, break hearts. So I’m gonna say something that I do not say to everyone: you’ve got an exceptional dick, please use it wisely.

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As a professional porn writer I should be able to find a better way of saying this, but sometimes simplicity conveys meaning far better than detail ever could. I need to ask you a favour: please will you put it in me?

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I pulled the title for this from a line in this post, and I think it’s apt – this story absolutely aches and throbs with need. Sometimes I read erotica so good I realise I’m holding my breath. This is one of those pieces. No more intro, here’s @mudkri.

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“I’ve been thinking of getting a cock ring,” my toyboy tells me, and I nearly reach through the screen and grab him by the collar as I bark: “do not even think about getting one that isn’t the Atom Plus Lux.” It’s the best vibrating cock ring I’ve ever used, by quite some margin, and my heart breaks at the thought of his burgeoning enthusiasm for sex toys being dampened by any lesser item. Besides, alongside other benefits of dating me (like my high-quality jokes and love of sucking cock), there are practical perks to dating a sex blogger too, namely: I’ll get you free cock rings if you flutter your eyelashes nicely.

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