Tag Archives: communication
Don’t be cool, be desperate
If someone were to ask me what I bring to the table, sex-wise, I wouldn’t mention specific parts of my body. My body is fine, my hair is fine, my clothes are basically clothes. I like to think I’ve got a pretty filthy grin, but apart from that my physicality is nothing to either write home or pen a strongly-worded letter of complaint about. So if we’re having sex, what I’m bringing to the party isn’t my body, it’s my attitude. To be blunt: my enthusiasm.
I’m not always going to do what you want
One of the weird things about being an adult – and I mean an adult adult, not the adult I was in my twenties who spent most of her time trying to please other people – is that I’m starting to recognise more situations in which I cause friction by just… not doing exactly what other people want. By ‘other people’ here, I mostly mean ‘men’.
You can’t say anything these days!
Today I’m going to tell you an old, old story. Guy meets girl in a workplace. Guy tries to chat girl up. She finds his comments overbearing and creepy. Guy continues, despite her discomfort. When the inevitable HR investigation happens, he explains to the boss that it was ‘only banter’. Starts jumping in any time other colleagues make jokes of any kind: “you wanna watch out, mate! You’ll get reported for that! You can’t say anything these days!”
Letter to the guys who send me private essays but never share any of my work
Hey there! Thanks so much for getting in touch off the back of one of my tweets. It’s flattering that you want to tell me your opinions/feelings/experiences when it comes to sex. I’m not gonna shame you for what you’re confessing, but please note: this isn’t actually a confessional.
Inclusive language: no one is taking the word ‘woman’ away
There’s been so much hateful, tedious, miserable bullshit written about trans people in the UK media it’s hard to pick out just one thing to rant about. I find it tricky to tackle the darker stuff, because I don’t know what I can contribute other than to just note that ‘GC’ (‘gender critical’) appears to be a new euphemism for ‘TERF’ (trans-exclusionary radical feminist), which itself is a euphemism for ‘transphobe’, and if your ideology requires you to actively fight against trans rights then you need to have a stern fucking word with yourself. Sometimes, though, the specifics feel easy enough that even I, an incompetent twat, might have something to contribute. Let’s talk about inclusive language, ‘pregnant people’, and why no one is trying to stop you from using the word ‘woman’.