As a general rule I don’t like blindfolds. I could try and bullshit you about how I like to look into someone’s eyes when they tip over the edge of a powerful orgasm, but while that’s true, it’s not the whole truth. My dislike of blindfolds comes from a meaner place. They’re a bit… tame, aren’t they? A bit … (whisper it) … 50 Shades? But laying my irrational snobbery to one side, the other day I cracked out one of my many airplane-branded blindfolds (they’re free, so I am literally allergic to not taking them home) to try some sensory deprivation sex.

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This post’s going to talk about control, BDSM, intense beatings, and a few things that my partner and I have discussed and negotiated in a lot of detail. It’s erotic fantasy in a role-play context: it is not a guide for life.  

Reward fucking: the act of getting exactly what I want because I’m a really good girl. Punishment fucking: the act of getting what I want by doing something that he – in turn – pretends to think is bad.

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He likes me to make eye contact when I’m sucking him off. He likes to see my big, wet eyes staring deeply into his. Imploring. Desperate. Needy. Close.

But when the roles are reversed, I want no eye contact. I want him to look down, or away, or at the colours and shapes behind his own eyelids. Never looking into mine.

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I’m rarely guilty of lying – at least intentionally. While I probably fuck up a fair few of my stories, and invent dialogue where I forgot the actual words, I lack the imagination to tell a properly whopping lie. But I am definitely guilty of editing stories depending on the audience – usually when I’m talking about watching porn with a partner.

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Sometimes I hear stories about kinky events or places, and I often wonder if they’re urban legends. I want to dig deeper and find someone who’s been – to a BDSM training manor, or to the sex taxi which apparently used to do trips around London. Well, this week’s guest blog is from someone who has been – Kate Julia White is an author and submissive, and she’s recently released a memoir of her BDSM training.

Her guest blog focuses on ‘The Manor’ – one of those places I’ve heard about but never been able to go to. So, naturally, as a voyeur and lover of secret things, I was delighted when she offered it as a guest blog, especially because it focuses on something that other guest blogs have highlighted before – the build-up and anticipation prior to launching into something. If you like it, check out her book – Tough Love: The True Story of My Submissive Adventures – check out her blog, and follow her on Facebook.

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