This beautiful true story about hooking up with a hottie is written by Victoria Blisse, and originally appeared on her website. It is read here by Girl on the Net.

When packing for my weekend away, I joked with my hubby about being prepared as I packed a dozen condoms and a full bottle of lube. I didn’t expect sexy times but with ten humans in one house for a celebration, well, the Queen of Smut wanted to be sure any sexy fun times would be catered for.

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There’s a question on OKCupid along the lines of ‘how do you prefer to sleep with a partner?’ – to check whether you like sleeping in your own space in the bed, or entwined with the other person like a pair of humping snakes. I am very much of the opinion that sleep is sacred, and if you try to hug me when it’s bedtime I am liable to genuinely cry. I’m not saying ‘don’t touch me in bed’, because sometimes we’re gonna want to fuck. But if sleep is top of the agenda, I cannot stress this enough: get off me.

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This is one of a bunch of random fiction pieces loosely gathered under the concept of ‘emotional fucks‘. Most of them are a bit vicious and harsh – hate fuck, pity fuck, spite fuck – because those are the ones I enjoy writing most, but very occasionally my heart becomes squishy and I have to write something nice. This one’s a friendly fuck… 

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This heatwave has now got so bad that even I am starting to miss cuddles. I’m normally far too into the banging to care about the post-fuck snuggles but… it’s getting to me, you know? The lack of human contact caused by the fact that I can’t successfully touch another human without either sticking to them or bursting into flames. So here are a few alternatives to cuddling in a heatwave.

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