Tag Archives: fantasy
Do women like porn?
Imagine a club in which all the doors are five foot six. You’re six foot tall, so you have to duck to enter. On your way to the club, you had to get out at the train station and hop onto a crowded shuttle bus. There was a person standing with a sign directing you to it:
“Shuttle bus for people below five foot six this way!”
When you walked past them to step onto the bus, they didn’t exactly tell you to leave, but a fair few people gave you weird looks.
Guest blog: interview with Shine Louise Houston
I’ve wanted to write about porn for a while, and when Shine Louise Houston got in touch about Snapshot – her latest crowdfunded erotic film, I thought it’d be an excellent excuse. So instead of a guest blog this week, Shine Louise was kind enough to answer some questions about her latest project: a feature-length erotic thriller.
If you pick up a newspaper – in the UK media at least – you’re likely to find that any discussion on porn is centered around a view of the porn industry as a homogenous whole. Big-name studios with questionable practices churning out easy, identikit films for a primarily straight male audience. This by no means an accurate picture. The general narrative that ‘porn is damaging/exploitative/bad/degrading’ is changing, albeit slowly – independent producers who make fairtrade porn, feminist porn, queer porn, and other films that don’t fit the stereotype – are getting more attention.
Since I started writing this blog, I’ve had the pleasure of meeting (and working with) brilliant porn producers like Pandora Blake and Petra Joy, and in turn they’ve recommended other porn producers who are creating unique and amazing films. One of these people is Shine Louise Houston, who founded Pink and White Productions – the company that produces the CrashPad Series (the Crash Pad is a secret apartment in San Francisco dedicated to hot, queer sex).
Let’s chat…
What it feels like to have period horn
On an average day, I can be turned on by a whole bunch of things. Hot people on the train, dudes who got caught in a rain shower, watching computer programmers… But when I’m on my period, or just coming off it, the list of things that give me that ‘unngh’ feeling – the kick in the gut of lust that I bang on about so much in my book – expands to include a hell of a lot more. Let’s talk period horn…
The fantasy dinner party
It’s pretty rare that someone shares an exact fantasy of mine, right down to every sticky detail. I think the same is true for most of us, which is why those ‘top fantasies’ surveys are usually far too broad to be useful on an individual basis. X per cent of men fantasise about having a threesome – big deal. Who is the threesome with? What happens during it? What’s the atmosphere like? Is the main participant a passive receptacle for the sexual whims of the other two, or are they an active and eager consumer, sampling whatever deviant delights they are offered? Is this threesome in a specific place, or are specific words said? When you get down to the granular detail of a fantasy, it’s incredibly rare to find someone who shares something identical, in every possible respect.
So, when I tell you that I once explained this fantasy to someone, and watched their eyes light up with gleeful enthusiasm, as they told me they had exactly the same desire, I hope you can understand just how rare that was. And how utterly soaked I was by the time they’d finished explaining exactly why they liked it too.
Do I have a smoking fetish?
I’m pretty obnoxious and annoying sometimes. I can be far too loud in some situations, and far too quiet in others. Sometimes I sit nervously in a corner checking my phone because I’m too shy to introduce myself. At other times, I drink a couple of pints in rapid succession to calm my nerves and end up saying things I wouldn’t say if I was sober. Both of these traits, along with many others, have caused me to miss out on opportunities to get laid. But none more so than one thing: smoking.
I smoke. And I kind of want to add ‘too much’ to that, but realistically smoking at all is usually too much when seen through the eyes of a non-smoker. When I was dating, the sheer number of people who’d write ‘I can’t stand smokers’ on their dating profiles, or tick the boxes that say ‘smoking is a dealbreaker’ means my pool of potential shag buddies was severely limited.
But smoking has also helped me get laid. Not because men see me across a crowded beer garden and go ‘oh look, her who’s too pissed to light the right end: she’s the one for me’, but because for the best part of my formative years, smoking was considered cool.
Which means that I have a really fucked up relationship with smoking and sex.