If you’ve ever tried to hunt down my Real Life Identity, you probably know one thing for sure: my name is not Sarah. Sarah is the name I used in my books, and it’s the one I use when talking to journalists about sex blogging, if they aren’t comfortable calling me ‘Girl’ or ‘GOTN’. It’s the helpful comfort blanket I wrap around myself to maintain my anonymity: a tasty morsel of reality with which to distract people who might look further. But there comes a point when ‘helpful’ nudges into ‘deceptive’ territory. Notably, when I’m shagging someone.

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This week’s guest blog is a little different – the fantastic Amy from Coffee and Kink (follow her on Twitter here!) has been canvassing some of the best Valentine’s Day stories from cool people who work in the adult industry. As you probably know, those of us who work here are often a bit eye-roll about the day, especially with all the pressure to Do Something Valentine’s Related if you’re a blogger. But this is my first Valentine’s Day as a single person in a long time, and I find myself less annoyed by it than I was when I was in a relationship: now I can view it from the outside, I enjoy living vicariously through other people’s happy times. Huge thanks to Amy, and to everyone who contributed to this piece – please do click the links and check out their amazing work!

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A long time ago on Twitter @sexlovevideo and @onqueerstreet were discussing objectification (re: the bond-coming-out-of-the-sea scene) and asking whether just flipping objectification around could be a feminist act, or whether we should avoid doing to men what the patriarchy has done to women since time immemorial (I am simplifying heavily here – read the thread and post for more). I am firmly in the former camp, let me explain why objectifying men is a feminist act and also what’s hot about fat guys. Pull up a chair and your sex toy of choice.

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This post is just a random collection of lessons I learned in 2021, and if I’m honest it’s also partly a vehicle for me to share with you some of my favourite posts and images from the past year. I’m extremely lucky to get to work with Stuart Taylor, who draws fresh new art each week which brings this blog to life in ways that are not only extremely fucking sexy (here’s my favourite hot image from the year – unngh) but also cute and funny (here’s my favourite cute/funny one!). The image that illustrates this post, by the way, comes from one of the things I most enjoyed writing this year: an ode to the walk of shame. Anyway. The end of December is a good time for taking stock of what you’ve learned in the last year, for for what it’s worth here are some of my lessons from 2021.

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The joy of fantasy and erotica is that you can live out scenarios which you may not be able to do in real life – or might hope for in the future, but which haven’t happened to fall into your lap yet in quite the right way. Today’s guest blogger, Sameerah from Erotics and Whatnot, is here to tell you a story about impulsive sex and the single woman. When she meets a guy on the bus, she’s offered a flash of opportunity. And this time, she might just reach out to take it…

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