This is one of those posts that goes into the sometimes dark places in my brain. As a result, it involves discussion of things like pain, BDSM, and roleplaying sex-as-punishment. Everything in the post is 100% consensual, but I’m just giving you a heads-up so if those things are likely to disturb you please don’t read on. 

We’re discussing the difference between corporal punishment and what I’m going to call ‘angry punishment.’ I explain to him that, in previous role-plays, I’ve struggled with the idea of rigid, ordered punishment. Counting spanks, measured chastisement, that kind of thing. The type of role-play where I am a naughty girl, and a guy in a position of authority is responsible for correcting me:

He orders me to bend over and touch my toes, stretching my thighs and arse taut for the cane or tawse. He makes me wait for what feels like an achingly long time, as my calves tingle and my cunt gets slick, and I wait for the first thwack.

At that moment what I’m hoping for isn’t one sharp stroke. I’m not anticipating a measured, precise stripe across my backside. But usually that’s what I get. One stripe – carefully applied – then the inevitable order:

“Count them.”

And I count. One, two, three, four… I count the strokes and I thank him for each one. This controlled, dominant guy, who will dish out exactly as much pain as I deserve and no more.

That’s nice – it is. But it’s not the best.

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There’s a question I’d never thought to ask myself about my own personal kinks: if you could flick a switch and make this go away – make your desires fit neatly with what most people see as ‘normal’, would you do it? This week’s guest blogger has asked that question, and has a bloody brilliant answer.

He’s also written beautifully about his fetish – Plushophilia – what the appeal is, how it works for him, and how other people have reacted. It’s an amazing post, and I’m delighted that he’s chosen to share it here.

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I’ve been desperate for an article on pony play for ages – it’s fascinating and cool and all the things that get me excited. The trappings seem satisfying and kinky, the role-play seems difficult yet deliciously immersive.

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I am a total sucker for beautiful descriptions of BDSM, so when this week’s guest blogger popped up in the comments on a blog about subspace, it made me really shivery. Today he’s here to go into a bit more detail, specifically about one of the most intense kink implements: the cane.

Please welcome BibulousOne – if you’re a fan of the cane, you’ll probably have a lot in common…

Update: he now has his own sex blog, so click the link to check out more of his writing.

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There’s a man who is half-human and half-legend. He is fierce, strong, powerful. He can pick you up with his bare hands, flip you over his knee, and give you a spanking so perfect that it will transport you to a new realm of ecstasy. Afterwards he will fuck you so skilfully that you will become aware of a new level of orgasmic joy.

That man is the Superdom.

If you’re lucky enough to meet him, it will probably be on a kink forum somewhere. Perhaps he will write a post explaining to other, lesser Doms how to control a submissive, hinting that if you’re lucky you could be one of them. Maybe he slides into your private messages with an order to “Obey.” If you don’t immediately slick your knickers/pop a huge, granite-hard boner, then you are probably not the submissive for him. He does not want your questions or your negotiation: he demands only your unquestioning obedience.

Superdom, sadly, is all too real. I met a fair few incarnations of him when I was pretty active on the kink scene. He’d look at you with smouldering eyes, and tell you exactly what he was going to do. He’d usually let you know that you could only come if he ordered you to, and that you’d come at exactly the moment he specified (yeah, right). He’d give you lists of punishments and tasks and insist on you calling him ‘Sir’, even if you’d never agreed to submit to him.

He was a dick.

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