People often think that dating a sex blogger consists of living every single day on a sexual rollercoaster: shagging first thing in the morning, enjoying a blow-job with your post-work Xbox session, and then filling your evenings with creative fucking as you test out brand new sex toys. Here’s what it’s actually like.

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It’s quite hard to pinpoint when I knew I wanted to be a sex blogger: I’ve definitely always wanted to write, but I don’t think I’d worked out my niche until recently. Even when I started this blog I was unconvinced that it would turn into a proper vocation – I saw it as a hobby that might somehow be practice for what I’d end up actually doing… until the day it turned into what I actually do. But maybe it actually started before that, as evidenced by this email that my best friend found from ten years’ ago, after a particularly awesome fuck…

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Today’s guest blogger has a moving and pretty heartbreaking story about relationships, privacy and sex blogging. It’s a really powerful, personal piece and it touches on a lot of things that I have worried about as a sex blogger, and that I suspect many other bloggers in similar situations worry about. She also talks a little about her relationship – which has a DD/lg dynamic, using the honorific ‘Daddy’ to refer to her partner, similar to the kind Cara Thereon wrote so beautifully about here a few weeks ago. If you’re likely to find that triggering, please don’t read on, but if you’re curious about it she’s kindly included more links to other bloggers who’ve written about this sort of play, so you can find out more if you’d like to.

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Listen up, companies! I know you want to engage with bloggers, and get our sweet sweet Google Juice, but I’ve had an extraordinary number of requests recently from people asking me for paid ‘dofollow’ links, so I feel a PSA is necessary. Here goes: if you nag me for a paid ‘dofollow’ link, I will not work with you. Not just on your link building, but on anything.

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For a while I’ve been contemplating a series of blog posts in which I argue, essentially, with myself. Taking on some of the bad arguments or terrible opinions I had years ago, which still exist on these pages for everyone to see. Every time my autotweet widget spits out something from the archive, I cringe in anticipation of what my past self said, ready to be embarrassed today by what I said five years ago. I’m not alone in this: we’ve all said things in the past that we don’t agree with today. And we all have to consider how we deal with embarrassing stuff when confronted by it, years later. Should we edit old blogs that we no longer agree with?

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