You know those meditation apps which show a circle increasing and decreasing in size, which encourage you to breathe in and out in time with the animation? Sometimes I like to fuck like that.

CN: drug use, minor references to panic attacks. But broadly this is a super-hot one, I promise. 

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Society will not officially be over its sexual hang-ups until it no longer seems refreshing or surprising to see romcom lovers fuck doggy-style. Until a heroic character can casually suck off a stranger and not be punished for it in act three. We will know when we’re over our squeamishness about fucking when Batman (who literally kills people on screen) is allowed to give Catwoman head. Sadly, news just in: Batman can’t give head.

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I could show you how to fuck me till I come, if you really want me to. You don’t need to perform or practice or keep an eye out for the sexy faces I make, reading them like I’m an ancient text you need to try and decipher. If you want to fuck me till I come, I can show you. (more…)

I was chatting to my dude recently about the least sexy kind of sex, and he mentioned ‘lie-back-and-think-of-England’ sex. You know the kind: where two people have sex out of a misplaced sense of duty, or the idea that that’s what they ‘should’ do. Thing is, though, I have an entirely filthy mind, and even this kind of sex can be extraordinarily arousing if you think of it in the right way. So he challenged me to write it: an erotic story about apparently un-erotic sex, and I had so much fun writing it that I recorded it as audio porn too…

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