The other day I squirted for the first time and it was fucking AWESOME so I’m going to tell you all about it. Regular readers will know that in the past my inability to squirt has caused me much heartache. I’d seen the people in porn squirting all over the place, including into the eager faces of their sexual partners, and my heart throbbed with sadness that I’d never quite managed to muster anything more than the odd sploosh. But finally – FINALLY – after years of longing and wishing and getting eagerly fingered to little result, I recently managed my first ever squirt and it was everything I’d dreamed of. Here’s how it happened, in case you’d either like to try it for yourself or just have a lovely wank because the thought of squirting turns you on.

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The last couple of times I had sex, I cried afterwards. I know, this blog post sounds like it’s going to be a little bit horrible: it is. Sorry about that. Sometimes life is full of hot fucking and joyful blow jobs, and sometimes… well, sometimes it is stress and panic and crying after sex.

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I wish I could remember my most powerful orgasm. Although I don’t believe in an afterlife, I like to think that if there was one, you’d get some ‘life stats’ before you passed over to the other side. Someone would tell you what your happiest day was, and you’d get to relive it. You’d get a tally of how many people, over the course of your existence, had nursed a giant crush on you. And you could see footage of your most powerful orgasm.

Although I can’t remember my own most powerful orgasm, today’s guest blogger can remember his. He is here to tell you all about it –  as well as the hot fuck that produced it – in deliciously pervy detail. Enjoy!

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OK gang, listen up because I’m angry. For years – YEARS – I have been recommending the Doxy to anyone and everyone with a clitoris. It’s the turbo-charged fuckstick of my wildest dreams and by my rough calculations it has delivered more orgasms in the three and a half years I’ve owned it than any living human has given me over the course of the rest of my life. Myself included. I love Doxy so much I would recklessly and gleefully abseil down the nearest tall building to unfurl a ‘FUCK YEAH DOXY’ banner that could be read from miles away. But now Doxy has launched a new toy – a compact wand called ‘Doxy Number 3‘ – and I am, to put it mildly, livid.

Here are 10 things I hate about the Doxy Number 3.

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I am squirming in my seat with delight about this week’s guest post. Innocent Loverboy (@innocentlb)is one of the first sex bloggers I ever met, way back at my first Eroticon in 2014. He’s not only a seriously lovely guy, he’s also a brilliant writer. His writing is funny, sweet, romantic, and sexy all rolled into one. Today ILB is here to tell you a story about subtle, sexy touching…

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