UPDATE 2018: The story I tell here is something that I found deeply hot and that was 100% consensual and happened with a guy I trust very much. We have a dynamic that includes some consensual non-consent (i.e. pretending that I don’t want something even if I do), and as a result we have very specific ways in which I’ll let him know if something is genuinely not what I want). Essentially, saying ‘no’ in a voice that sounds like ‘yes.’ However, this blog post was written a long time ago when I didn’t know how to explain that very well, and as a consequence lots of people thought it was disturbing or genuinely non-consensual. 

If you enjoy consensual non-consent, you might enjoy this post. If you don’t, please don’t read on. 

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