In my neverending quest to come up with new ways to remind you to BUY THINGS FROM MY SPONSORS PLS, I cannot quite believe I’ve never done this, the most obvious and fun thing of all. Here are some Valentine’s poems, with links to the absolutely brilliant companies that support my website. They’re here mainly as a reminder to you that every click on every link – in posts, on ads, and in tweets as well, helps me to keep doing what I do. If you like the poems, or any of the other content I write, please consider clicking these links and buying whatever sexy stuff your little heart desires – for Valentine’s Day, or any day. Cos roses are red, violets are blue, and I couldn’t do this if it weren’t for you.

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This week’s guest blog is a little different – the fantastic Amy from Coffee and Kink (follow her on Twitter here!) has been canvassing some of the best Valentine’s Day stories from cool people who work in the adult industry. As you probably know, those of us who work here are often a bit eye-roll about the day, especially with all the pressure to Do Something Valentine’s Related if you’re a blogger. But this is my first Valentine’s Day as a single person in a long time, and I find myself less annoyed by it than I was when I was in a relationship: now I can view it from the outside, I enjoy living vicariously through other people’s happy times. Huge thanks to Amy, and to everyone who contributed to this piece – please do click the links and check out their amazing work!

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Sometimes the stars align into a constellation that literally spells out “I HAVE THE BEST JOB IN THE WORLD, GODDAMMIT”, and so it was on the 20th January this year, when I got a little message from a shipping company telling me my package from Intimate Chocolate had arrived. My package of a gigantic, delicious, beautiful hazlenut-and-chocolate dick. I am supposed to ‘review’ this for the website, but you lot know me by now and so what I’m actually going to do is wax lyrical about how fucking awesome this whole situation is, then tell you how I got overexcited and suggested to a mate who was visiting that we should competitively deep-throat it.

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This post is just a random collection of lessons I learned in 2021, and if I’m honest it’s also partly a vehicle for me to share with you some of my favourite posts and images from the past year. I’m extremely lucky to get to work with Stuart Taylor, who draws fresh new art each week which brings this blog to life in ways that are not only extremely fucking sexy (here’s my favourite hot image from the year – unngh) but also cute and funny (here’s my favourite cute/funny one!). The image that illustrates this post, by the way, comes from one of the things I most enjoyed writing this year: an ode to the walk of shame. Anyway. The end of December is a good time for taking stock of what you’ve learned in the last year, for for what it’s worth here are some of my lessons from 2021.

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As part of my run of getting sex toy blog posts written up so you know what to buy before Christmas, let’s get stuck into this quickly so you’ve plenty of time to shove one in your basket. There are two things I love about the Pillow Talk Sassy vibe (kindly sent to me by my site sponsor The Pleasure Garden). The first is its simplicity. The second is that when I first had a wank with it, I came in under thirty seconds.

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