You’ve probably heard of the Doxy wand, and Doxy Number 3, and if you’re into ridiculously and intensely powerful, rumbly vibrations the chances are you’ll have one of these beautiful sex toys already. But did you know Doxy butt plugs also exist? Please have a seat (on an inferior butt plug, if you must) and let me yell enthusiastically at you about how great these butt plugs are.

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I’m not a massive fan of getting head. I’ve said it before, and people are occasionally horrified: how can I call myself a feminist if I don’t insist on oral equality? I am a huge fan of giving head: I take egomaniacal pride in being able to suck cock so well that it has my other half whimpering and trembling on the edge of orgasm for the duration of an entire Portishead song. So where’s the reciprocal pleasure? What of the famed ‘orgasm gap’? Surely I, as a feminist, should insist on oral reciprocity? No.

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So far I’ve been silent on the horrorshow that is Goop – Gwyneth Paltrow’s bullshit-engine which advocates wellness ‘treatments’ designed to cure you of your money. She recommends anything from vaginal steaming (argh) to jade eggs, making ludicrous claims about how these things can help you ‘detox’ and generally improve your life. I haven’t bothered with it until now, but my Twitter feed is currently packed with news and snark about ‘Goop Lab’ – her new show where she demonstrates some of the pseudoscience she’s trying to flog you – so I’d feel negligent if I didn’t write something. What’s more, I recently realised this problem isn’t limited to Goop: a sex toy website that I otherwise have a lot of time for has started peddling weird bullshit along with its jade eggs, and it breaks my fucking heart. Let’s start by tackling jade eggs and other cuntstones, and why the dodgy claims about their magical powers aren’t just ‘harmless fun’. I’ll save vaginal steaming for another angry day.

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This week’s guest blogger is Sara, who you’ll have met before in her amazing post about what happened when her girlfriend released her from chastity. Today’s guest blog contains an equally hot scenario and I am not sure what I love more about it: the sheer intense hotness of the fuck, or the skill and patience which was put in to making it perfect. As someone who’s a big fan of VR porn sex games, I am in absolute awe of what happens here, and I hope if you got similar gifts for Christmas, it might inspire you to see if you achieve similarly orgasmic things…

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Today’s guest blogger is the fabulous Amber Parks, a camgirl and huge fan of wand vibrators, as you’ll be able to tell from her awesome post below! It is always a pleasure to meet a fellow kindred spirit – the day I fell in love with my own Doxy wand is not one I’ll ever forget, but Amber’s gone one better by using it in her camming work and making it pay for itself many times over. When you’ve read her awesome guest post, check out Amber’s blog Cruel Princess or follow her on Twitter @acruelprincess to see more of her work!

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