I’ll admit it – I’m shameless. Sometimes I write things because they make me horny, sometimes I write things because I know they make other people horny, and sometimes… well… sometimes I email other sex bloggers and ask them to write things because I really want to hear them describe something hot in intense detail.

When someone first used a Doxy massager on me, I was struck by the idea that the orgasm wasn’t so much something that I’d contributed to – by grinding against things or thinking ‘happy orgasm wave thoughts’ – but something that was being torn from me. Like a hot, juddering, almost involuntary muscle spasm. Part of that, I think, comes from the fact that the person holding the Doxy doesn’t have to do much – they can just hold it tight up against my clit and watch me squirm and squawk like a cat trapped in a laundry basket. I want something that does the same thing for guys. So, having researched and settled on the Rev1000 – a thing that looks like a sci-fi sink plunger, but which promises hands (and effort-free) orgasms, I did the obvious, shameless thing: I contacted a guy who’d used one and asked him to tell me all about it.

This is Andy – AKA RuffledSheets, who was lovely enough to oblige my whims. I’m massively grateful to him for indulging me, so please do check out his blog, follow him on Twitter, and check out his thoughts (and hot NSFW pics) after the jump.

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I find exercise for its own sake incredibly tedious. Running, cycling, picking up weights then putting them down again: I get why some people like it, but I’m not one of those people. Moving muscles for a purpose: picking up heavy boxes to move house, running for a bus, cycling because you just need to get somewhere – fine. But moving for the sake of moving isn’t something I’ve ever been excited about.

As with biceps, triceps and whatever ‘glutes’ are, same with kegels. The idea of doing special exercises to strengthen the muscles in my cunt leaves me a bit cold. I’m having a go right now as I write this, probably making odd quizzical faces and feeling glad I’m not in an open plan office, and the sensation I get from it can best be described as ‘meh.’

But during sex? Or a wank? That’s when those kegels really come into their own.

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Ever wondered what it’d be like to be stimulated in public by an eager person with a vibe control in their hand?

This is the first post in my Sex Fairies project (where anyone can request a sex toy they’ve always wanted, and SexToys.co.uk make some of those dreams come true). When I started it I was inundated with awesome suggestions and requests for toys, but one toy got more requests than any other: The BlueMotion Nex 1 Panty Vibe. Why? Well perhaps it’s because it’s futuristic and stuff: the vibe sits in your pants and is controlled by an app on your phone, meaning you can give your handset to someone else and let them dial up or down the vibrations. Perhaps it’s because it’s one of very few sex toys you can use in public without being arrested. Perhaps it’s just because, well, it looks really fucking fun.

The aim of the Sex Fairies project is less about reviewing toys (because lots of bloggers do that really well already) and more about the overall experience. When you’re given a toy you’ve been wanting for a while, does the hotness live up to expectations? We gave a knicker vibrator to a submissive, horny lady and asked her to let us know…

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Where’s all the hot porn of guys using sex toys? Oh, that’s right, it’s often self-uploaded onto tube sites, or on gay-guy specific sites. How often is this stuff pitched to straight women? RARELY. Well, here’s my pitch.

I love the look of a guy when he’s got his junk in his hand. Boyfriends who take dirty snaps to send me from a distance when they’re gripped around it, and pulsing with the need to come: amazing. I still have one or two favourite photos (OK, so one is a video) of guys I know doing bad bad things to themselves, and gleefully recording the evidence so I can watch it later.

One guy sat spread-legged on the floor, camera phone propped in front to give a tight-cropped shot of his junk, and rapidly milked himself into his own left hand. Unngh.

I’ve talked before about Schroedinger’s Wank – that the hottest of all possible ‘guywanking’ scenarios is the one I can probably never see. Because what I want is to see him doing it exactly what he’d do for himself if I weren’t there – all pleasure, no performance. Sadly I’ll never be quite invisible or sneaky enough to be able to see this, but there is one thing that makes watching guy wanks hotter…

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