Ride of the Valkyries makes it in, obviously, as does Night On Bare Mountain, but Oh Fortuna is far too funny and Pachelbel’s Canon too soft. We’re sitting on the sofa skimming through a Spotify list of ‘Top 100 Classical Music Bangers’ and, of course, selecting which ones we will fuck to.

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I would love for everyone to have the opportunity – at some point in their life, or ideally at multiple points in their life – to really nerd out about sex. Explore all their questions about sensation with someone who has questions of their own. When Jenny S pitched me her story about asexual exploration as a guest blog, I was so excited to read about her doing exactly this – nerding out and zooming in on lots of different sexual curiosities. I hope you enjoy this gorgeous guest blog as much as I did, and maybe see it as a jumping off point for some curious exploration of your own…

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This is a story about a woman having a wank. I know I’ve already told you one story about a woman having a wank, but this one’s very different. Imagine, please, a woman lying on top of the duvet on her bed, sometime around midday, curtains closed so she doesn’t shock the neighbours, rifling through her memory banks for a sexy idea that’ll help her get to a quick orgasm before she has to sit back down at her desk. She settles on something that fits the mood, so brings her fingertips to her mouth – spitting on them gently so as to start warming up her clit.

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I’m a huge fan of first times, almost as big a fan as I am of the awesome Missy of Focused and Filthy, who has one hell of a first to share today: recently she experienced her very first sensual tantric massage. And I have to admit I am wildly curious about this kind of thing as well. Giving your body over to someone else to massage and pleasure slowly and intensely… yeah. Sounds hot. But even though I knew it would be hot, I was not prepared for how stunning it sounds when Missy explains it in detail…

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Apropos of absolutely nothing, I’m going to tell you a story about this one time (ages ago) when I fucked the furniture. Specifically a bed. And technically, properly, I guess if you want to get right down to the nitty-gritty detail of the thing, it wasn’t just ‘me fucking a bed’, it was ‘us’. Because while I shagged the bed with my excellent and adventurous vagina, the man I loved was having a valiant go at simultaneously fucking me up the arse. Let’s do this.

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