Tag Archives: true
Guest blog: Straight men can’t joke
As a general rule I don’t like people quoting me in guest blogs on my own site. It feels too recursive and narcissistic, even for me. BUT. Today’s guest – Oscar, big big thanks to him – has a really important point to make, and straight people (STRAIGHT MEN) need to hear it. It’s about a topic extremely close to my heart, and vitally important in my (and so many other people’s) dating lives. Actually fuck it, not just their dating lives, their lives in general. Today we’re gonna talk about jokes. Specifically, why it appears that straight men can’t joke with women who they might also be interested in boning…
A thousand words about a picture
We’re both quite sweaty, that’s the first thing. This picture is all the hotter because of that. There’s a light sheen on the side of his face, but I – as ever – am the sweatiest. Hair in wet curls plastered to my neck and forehead, the white shirt I’m wearing absolutely drenched to near transparency. The photo was taken at a fun, bouncy gig. We’d been dancing.
NRE: This clit rose vibe helped me through incredibly horny times
“Every time I come round,” my new boyfriend notes, “you have different dicks all over the place.” That’s right! I know how to impress a gentleman. Most of the time, the only sex toys that’ll be on display around my flat are my staple wank tools: one dildo, a wand and a couple of different bullet vibes that I swap in and out depending on which one is charged. But lately I’ve been branching out – dusting off some of the other things from my collection so I can mix up my masturbation even more. I could try and tell him that it’s because I’ve a discerning vagina like Epiphora or that I’m a wise and serious reviewer like my colleague Amy of Coffee and Kink. But the truth is, as always, far grubbier than that: I have loads of sex toys around the place because at the moment I’m so horny that if I don’t mix up my wanking tools I am liable to turn my clit numb from experiencing the same sensation over and over again. Picture the scene: a carnage of cocks, each one becoming obsolete within a couple of days of use because I’ve got NRE and I’m so aflame with excitement that I’m wanking four or five times a day. Desperately switching between rumbly bullets, buzzy ones, thudding wands and rabbit vibes just to try and surprise my junk into wringing one more orgasm from a body that has already been thoroughly rinsed. Now understand how grateful I was when my site sponsors Whipple Tickle sent through this rose vibe clit toy: a sex toy that provides a genuinely new sensation with which none of my other toys can compete. Hallelujah! A change really is as good as a rest!
What’s so good about being called a ‘good girl’?
The first time he says it, he makes a face as he utters the words. Not in disgust, but definitely discomfort, as if he’s not used to saying them. The phrase might sound weird to his ears, but it’s wonderful to mine: good girl.
Guest blog: Letting the internet dominate me
I absolutely love creative kinky ideas, and today’s is one I have seen (and participated in!) over on Mastodon a few times already, so I’m delighted that Persephone dropped by to share her cool kink with you. And if you yourself want to be dominated, and give your life over to strangers to influence and manage, then hey – you might want to try copying her kickass idea, and letting the internet dominate you too…