Tag Archives: wanking
Edging: the hotness of aching to come, and the moment you finally do
He sent me a picture of it once – swollen, bright red, and leaking a fat, shiny drop of pre-come. Skin so taut I could tell he’d been edging, even if he hadn’t told me. Seven days’ worth, if I remember correctly. Seven days of edging – touching it, stroking it, playing gently enough that he wouldn’t quite climax. Until the whole thing ached and he had to go to extreme lengths to get settled down before he had to leave the house. Digging fingernails into his thighs, cold water, that kind of thing…
Porn: not all of it is for you
As the sun will rise every morning, so each day an internet commenter will decide that something new is The Worst Thing To Ever Have Happened.
I’m not prone to slagging off commenters – you who join in below the line, adding critique, debate, praise and hilarious jokes about this one time you fell off the bed while fucking – you are a valuable and incredible part of the internet. Sniffy bloggers like me don’t have a monopoly on opinions, and frequently the contribution of thoughtful, awesome people adds loads to a topic, or makes me snort coffee out of my nose when they drop a particularly hilarious pun. Comments are incredibly valuable: I’d be a liar if I told you differently.
But there is one kind of commenter who can fuck utterly off. And it’s someone I had only made passing acquaintance with until I started working for hot porn site Dreams of Spanking. It’s this person:
“Eww. Why on earth would you post two men going at it?”
“Sorry, but this just isn’t my thing AT ALL.”
“What the hell is THAT?”
Giving up bad sex habits
“What’s that?”
“A spreadsheet of my best wanking times.”
He didn’t even ask why. He just laughed, rolled his eyes, and then wandered into the kitchen to make coffee. But, for the record, I am compiling a spreadsheet of my wanking times, so that I can eventually graph the results and post a blog about it. Why?
Nipples are the best, please never forget them
God, I love nipples.
Never has a bunch of nerve-endings been collected so neatly together in one place only to be so frequently overlooked as on the human nipple.
Sure, they have a legit purpose – they can sometimes be used to feed babies. Occasionally they can be used to shock facebook users into pressing the ‘OMG get rid of it I am so horrified’ button. After a lot of experimentation, I can tell you that they can’t be used as an alternative to a fingerprint to unlock the iPhone 5.
But what they can be used for is to push me swiftly over the edge into fairly intense arousal.
Watching guys use sex toys
Where’s all the hot porn of guys using sex toys? Oh, that’s right, it’s often self-uploaded onto tube sites, or on gay-guy specific sites. How often is this stuff pitched to straight women? RARELY. Well, here’s my pitch.
I love the look of a guy when he’s got his junk in his hand. Boyfriends who take dirty snaps to send me from a distance when they’re gripped around it, and pulsing with the need to come: amazing. I still have one or two favourite photos (OK, so one is a video) of guys I know doing bad bad things to themselves, and gleefully recording the evidence so I can watch it later.
One guy sat spread-legged on the floor, camera phone propped in front to give a tight-cropped shot of his junk, and rapidly milked himself into his own left hand. Unngh.
I’ve talked before about Schroedinger’s Wank – that the hottest of all possible ‘guywanking’ scenarios is the one I can probably never see. Because what I want is to see him doing it exactly what he’d do for himself if I weren’t there – all pleasure, no performance. Sadly I’ll never be quite invisible or sneaky enough to be able to see this, but there is one thing that makes watching guy wanks hotter…