Tag Archives: ways to fuck
Sleep sex, and other things I’ve done in the night
This post discusses sleep sex (and sleep ‘other things’). Everything that happens here is 100% consensual, with a guy I trust a lot, and with whom I have had numerous conversations about sleep shagging. It is not an endorsement to go ahead and do this with people who you haven’t had similar conversations with, obviously.
Apparently on Saturday night I kept a guy awake for hours by repeatedly wrapping my arms round him and begging him to touch my tits.
Yeah, that’s weird, isn’t it?
I was also either 100% asleep for the entire thing, or I have suffered selective amnesia. When he explained to me, very patiently, on Sunday morning that he was a bit knackered ‘because of your weird midnight nipple demands’ you could have knocked me down with a feather. You could also have knocked him down with a feather, because – thinking I was awake – he kindly acquiesced, until eventually he fell asleep on me for a while before I woke him up for more.
Teenage kicks versus having sex in your thirties
As a certified grumpy bastard, I can tell you that it’s always much easier to be negative than positive. As someone with access to web stats I can also tell you that if you want to get clicks, and you’re not writing porn, you’re always better to be critical than optimistic. I’m throwing all that out of the window today, though, because of a conversation I had the other day that went a little something like this:
“Know what’s brilliant?”
“What?”
“We could have sex now if we wanted to.”
“I’m not really in the mood, but…”
“Ah, but you don’t have to want to, you just have to appreciate how cool it is that we totally could if we wanted to.”
Sometimes I go through miserable phases when I look down at my body and think ‘huh, there are some things that have happened here that are basically irreversible.’ I worry about stretchmarks or consider the fact that I’m no longer able to do the things I did when I was eighteen. I may still be able to get my ankles behind my head to brace against the bedposts, but I’ll no longer do it without a groan of effort. I can bend over sexily, but I’ll say ‘oof’ when I get up. Cramp is not so much an occasional visitor as a permanent unwanted house guest.
But, while it’s easy (and certainly more clickbait-friendly) to snark about the negatives, it’s also worth remembering the benefits of having sex in your thirties. This post is about giving credit to all the things I often take for granted…
Guest series: 24 year old virgin (part two)
Last week I put up the first in a three-part series by Mary. Mary is (or was) a 24-year-old virgin, and she wanted to write a series detailing her first-time experiences, and tackling some of the myths and misconceptions about virginity.
Read part one here, if you haven’t already, in which Mary meets A on Tinder, is delighted to discover just how soft penis skin is, and almost gets busted by a passing cyclist when she gets a bit handsy in public. When you’re up to date, check out part 2 below, where we join Mary and A as they’re working out what to do next…
Guest series: 24 year old virgin (part one)
This is a new thing, and I hope you like it as much as I do. For a while on my guest blog page I’ve had an open call for people to pitch me a series of blog posts dealing with a particular topic. This is the first in a series that does exactly that.I often get asked whether being a virgin past the average age (whatever the hell it means, or the average age even is) is a turn-off, or something to hide. And given that so many of my ‘first times’ are long behind me, I feel like I’m not the right person to tackle what this is like for people today, or give the kind of first-hand account that I’d like to. So I’m handing over to someone who can. Mary is (or was) a 24 year old virgin, and she’s here to tell you about her journey. Her writing is funny, hot, and she’s brilliantly tackling some of the weird assumptions and taboos we have around ‘virginity’ and sexual experience. This is the first post of three…
Guest blog: “Fisting the wife until she comes”
OK, so obviously I am excited to publish a guest blog on fisting. Perhaps even more than that, though, I am excited to publish a blog that so perfectly captures one of my favourite things about porn: that when you watch something that presses a really specific kinky button in your brain, it can give you a rush of excitement and joy that you just can’t wait to try out.
The guest blogger (who has asked to stay anonymous) writes beautifully about both the inspiration and the fulfilment of her desire, and I hope you enjoy her story every bit as much as I did.