Stoya calls them ‘comets’: those people who orbit your life at a distance, occasionally blazing into it for brief yet bright moments of sexy joy, before whooshing off back to their own. I don’t think it’s always easy to be a great comet – it requires a tricky balance of charm and composure. You need the ability to connect well in a short space of time combined with a casual detachment that allows you to say a cheery goodbye without worrying you’ll be forgotten the second you’re out of sight. I think it’s tough to be a good comet, but let me tell you about a brilliant one of mine.

(more…)

Eroticon is the conference for sex bloggers, erotic writers and other creative types, and Eroticon 2023 will be held on June 10/11 (Saturday and Sunday) in Camden. It is, hands down, the most useful and fun event I ever go to, and I’m shamelessly evangelical about it. If you’ve ever looked at what I do here and thought ‘that GOTN is a lucky fuck, to be able to bang on about shagging for a living’, you’re correct. I am lucky. And although obviously a lot of the credit should go to the incredible guest writers and readers I work with, and the sponsors who support what I do here, a huge chunk should also go to Eroticon: the launchpad to my career (if you wanna call it that, which I absolutely DO). Whether you’re a new blogger hoping to establish yourself or an old hand wanting to expand your skills and learn more cool stuff, or just a curious person with a desire to get stuck in to some sex-related creativity, come join us in June for Eroticon 2023!

(more…)

I dipped into Twitter occasionally when I was on leave last month, and one of the things I spotted was a tweet that made me riotously horny. It was from @19syllables, one of my favourite people on Twitter (her feed is so full of joy and beauty, I love her). She tweeted “Kiss chase, but you and me in a forest and if you catch me you can take me.” It gave me all the soft-yet-powerful horny feelings. So I wrote this.

(more…)

[Ages ago I did a tweet that included a silly joke about wanting to bundle men up in a blanket and give them a hand job and a stern talking-to. Someone messaged me to say there might be some smut in that, so I had a go at writing some. I don’t know how good it is, just that I had fun writing it. It hinges on eroticisation of sexual shame (specifically masturbation shame), so please note I don’t actually think it is shameful to masturbate, obviously: wanking is one of my favourite hobbies. But shame is fun to kink, so that’s what I’m doing here.]

You promised you wouldn’t come while you were away. I was looking forward to all the spunk built up during my seven day absence – that thick, powerful brand of cum that thuds from your dick after a long period of denial and frustration. You promised me you wouldn’t come. And yet the second my flight had landed, I received a text from you letting me know that you failed.

(more…)

Regular readers will know how much I love a good ‘first time’, in fact I have a tag right here on the blog for it: check out the kickass variety of first times people have shared, from first threesomes to first prostate orgasms and first time visiting a strip club, I adore hearing about those moments of sexy discovery. And if they come with detailed orgasmic descriptions, even better. So imagine how over the moon I was to hear from this week’s guest blogger, Star, who offered to share a pretty fucking special first time of her own: her very first orgasm with a neovulva! Take it away Star…

(more…)