For ages I’ve had it on my guest blog page that I’d love to read guest blogs that contain “eloquent disagreement/rebuttal of any of my own strong and angry opinions” but people rarely ever take me up on it. Maybe they think I will bite, which is unfair because honestly I usually prefer to be the one who gets bitten. BUT NOW I HAVE ONE! Rebuttal! Disagreement! And the hottest kind of disagreement, too! Imagine me rubbing my hands together with absolute glee today, because the fabulous @OxyFromSG (of ‘I sucked my own cock‘ fame, who also writes fabulous erotica as Alec Lake) is here with a guest post in defence of 69ing. The horny position in which two people are top-and-tail and going to town on each other’s genitals is also very often at the top of people’s lists of ‘overrated sex acts’, mine included. So I’m absolutely delighted (and thoroughly aroused) to have the chance to read his defence of the humble (or not-so-humble) 69….

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I have very little truck with entertainment that simply makes me think – I want to read, watch and listen to stuff that makes me fucking feel. And few genres on this planet are more effective at making people feel stuff than porn. Direct, intense, powerful: compelling people to touch themselves, revelling in the sensation of their crotch thudding hot and warm with blood. I adore porn, and in fact I will happily recommend you some fabulous sites if you’d like to buy a sub to get your rocks off (click the ads! And if you can’t see any porn ads, hit refresh until you do!). I don’t actually watch porn while I’m wanking, though, and every now and then I have a conversation with someone in which they look at me like I’m weird when I tell them I can (and usually do) get off without porn. I’m a sex blogger who has access to a lifetime’s worth of free porn! Why aren’t I watching it all the time?! It’s like they feel sorry for me, having to make do with just the thoughts in my head instead of the magic on screen. All the while, I’m feeling sorry for them, because they don’t have access to the kind of content that plays in my own private cinema.

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It’s that time again! Eroticon 2023 meet and greet! If you’re new to Eroticon and you want to let people know you’re coming (so they can get excited to meet you/keep an eye out for you to say hello in the pub), join in and copy/paste the questions then post the answers on your own blog. I know the main point of this is to say hi, but it also provides an extra function which is encouraging those who might be wavering to buy a ticket (or apply for a free ticket if money is tight) and come join us. So… join us!

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London has a population of almost nine million. It is one of the most vibrant, exciting, busy cities in the world. At the same time, most of the people who live here (myself included) have an instinctive distrust of strangers, and a powerful desire to not be bothered by one. So how do you meet people in this context? In the past I’ve relied heavily on dating apps. But as most people on The Apps agree, dating apps fucking suck these days. Let’s examine some potential ways to get laid without dating apps, with the aim that by the end of the year I will have DEFINITELY TRIED ALL OF THEM and if I haven’t you can tell me off for wussing out.

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This bored and ignored scenario is the next in the wank tales series, which I tried to write up to balance out some of the more aggressive and brutal ones. There’s still a lot of desperation/urgency in this one, but way more consent. In the spectrum of what I tend to find hot, this is at the cutest end. 

I’m reading a book. It doesn’t need to be an erotic book, and in fact it’s probably better if it isn’t. Just a book that I’m really absorbed by: perhaps a re-read of one of my favourite page-turners or something brand new by an author I adore. I’m lying across the bed on my stomach with my nose buried in a Kindle. He comes in and lies next to me on the bed.

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